


Love me, don’t hurt me

by Gigi_Bell



Series: Criminal/Mafia [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: (Really all of the drug/gang stuff is barely mentioned), Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Gangsters, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drug Dealing, Eventual Sex, Falling In Love, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mafia EXO (EXO), Panic Attacks, Smut, Social Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:15:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 34,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24955924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gigi_Bell/pseuds/Gigi_Bell
Summary: Baekhyun snatched his hand away and grabbed the edge of the counter, breath catching.“Oh. Shy,” Chanyeol mused, ducking his head down to catch Baekhyun’s eyes once more, “I can deal with that, little one.”(In which Baekhyun - a socially anxious teen - is sold to Chanyeol, a gangster, to be his whore, but things don’t turn out that way)
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol
Series: Criminal/Mafia [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2055231
Comments: 38
Kudos: 444





	1. That night I put my youth in a casket, and buried it inside of me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This work is solely mine, I do not allow stories to be posted on any other site, and any translations that are done will be posted here on my own page, I don’t allow my works to be posted under any other accounts.

Baekhyun had a hard time talking. 

Not that he was socially awkward or anything.

But, he had an issue with speaking because he tended to be nervous, he was a nervous person in general.

He had a lot of reasons to attribute to that. 

Perhaps it was when his mother left at age three.

Perhaps it was when his father turned to the streets when he was nine after he had lost his job at a huge law firm.

 _“Things happen to people all the time, Baekhyun.”_ His father had growled at him when he had asked why they couldn’t afford to use the lights at night. _“Get used to it. You can’t be spoiled forever.”_

The thing was, Baekhyun had never been spoiled. 

He’d never gotten to pick a candy from the store, he’d never gotten to make any friends, he’d never gotten anything more than the government funded lunch programs at school.

Baekhyun had never gotten more than bruises from when his father was fed up with him.

He had never gotten more than spit in his face from his father's anger when he pushed a little too hard.

Back then he didn’t think asking for a little attention was too much, he didn’t think bothering his father when he had people over was too much work.

But, now he knew the reason was because his father hadn’t been up to any good, he hadn’t been doing anything good at all.

He’d been sitting in the living room grinding up pills, his friends were much, much older than Baekhyun's thirteen year old self.

He’d walk in with his spelling test between his fingers, would have chills when he had to walk past the old men because they had always given off the creepiest of vibes.

“Dad? I… I wanted you to see this. If you’re not too busy…” 

But, his father was always busy and would grunt a demand for him to go make dinner - the issue being they had nothing to make - or if Baekhyun was lucky it was just no acknowledgment at all.

Sometimes it was an angry snarl and grabbing his wrist, shoving him so hard he tripped over his feet and fell onto his bottom.

Baekhyun used to just sit against the wall and listen to them sometimes, because he wanted to understand his father too.

Maybe he’d like him more if he understood him. 

_“Man, your kids gonna be good looking one day.”_ He recalled one of the pervy men say. He was young and hadn’t recognized the tone.

 _“Yeah. Probably gonna be a cold hearted bitch too.”_ His father replied and it made Baekhyun's heart hurt.

 _“Should break him in now,”_ The man continued sleazily, _“I’ll pay you big money for the boy.”_

There was a time he worried his father would accept, because he wasn’t fully sure what was happening, he didn’t understand the implications.

The only thing Baekhyun understood was that his father's friends weren’t good for him at all, and the white powder all over the living room gave him a headache if he stayed out there too long, making his knees weak.

_“Not yet.”_

Not yet. 

Not yet.

Baekhyun found the phrase haunting even back then, because he didn’t know what they had planned for him, but he had only been thirteen, and even then he could tell it was not good.

At thirteen he learned how to move his dresser in front of his door at night because he was afraid of what not yet meant.

The next year, days after his birthday he had come home early from school, he had felt sick but his father never answered the house phone so he had walked the three miles from school home.

He remembered the way all eyes were on him when he walked in, pulling his ragged backpack onto his shoulder and ducking his head, “Do yo-you know where my dad is?” He had asked, stomach churning anxiously.

_“Why don’t you come here, pretty boy? I’ll tell you.”_

It didn’t sound much a compliment, and Baekhyun almost had, because he knew if his father was around the man would have clicked his tongue and told him to listen to his “uncles.” 

They weren’t family by any means, but his father was adamant he called them as such despite the fact Baekhyun didn’t even know any of their names.

And he hated the way they influenced his father. 

But, money had started to get better that year too, but along with that it seemed these men were at their house more and more, partying all night and keeping Baekhyun wide awake until two hours before he’d need to be at school.

Baekhyun knew now he made the right choice because his father hadn’t been there - he didn’t even know if his father would have cared what would have happened anyway - but he shuffled in place, “Uncle, I have homework.” 

_“Don’t worry about that, sugar, we have much better things to teach you.”_

He ran to his room after that, heart racing because he could feel a panic attack crawling up his neck.

It was the right choice, the best one, because after he had shoved his dresser into its rightful spot in front of the door, his doorknob moved. 

_“Can’t hide forever, pretty boy,”_ He heard spat, but was just glad they didn’t try harder.

He made sure to sneak home into his bedroom window after that.

Baekhyun was only fifteen when he realized what was going on. 

Had only been playing cards by himself when he heard the front door slam and the sound of police sirens driving past, curses filling the house.

 _“You better not have gotten us caught asshole!”_

_“Like it wasn’t your fault! It was your idea to enter Park’s territory! They took all our coke! What else do we have to sell this week, I got a mouth to feed!”_

_“Hey. That’s not my problem, that’s your kid man.”_

Baekhyun didn’t eat that whole week other than the school sandwiches.

It was also the week he started stealing dollars from his father's stash.

Not to spend, but to save.

Because he didn’t want to stay here anymore.

He was afraid.

He slept with a knife under his pillow and woke up at the smallest of noises, chills running down his spine at the sounds of laughter.

Baekhyun would count what he had everyday for the next two years, sometimes he got lucky and his father had a lot, he’d snatch hundreds, and sometimes it was merely five dollars.

But it counted, and his father was usually too high to notice.

Baekhyun would hear his door jingle at night when the parties were very loud, and had even curled up in the corner of his room holding a knife because the dresser slid away from the door when someone attempted to open it.

In the end, nobody got inside, and for that he considered himself lucky. 

What a smart kid, his teachers praised him, and he wondered what they would say should he tell them he slept barely ten hours a week.

That he had to study with a flashlight in his hand and mainly only read so much because he had nothing else to do.

He wondered.

And he counted.

Not enough. 

_Not yet._

******

When Baekhyun was seventeen he made money faster, he’d gotten a season job at a baseball stadium around the corner from his house handing out snacks at the counter, smiling and laughing.

He genuinely liked the job.

He made friends there.

His first friend ever was a man named Jongin.

He was tall and sweet, a year younger but was always kind and very sweet about Baekhyun’s awkwardness, about his nerves and anxiousness sometimes.

Baekhyun appreciated that, because he struggled.

It was hard to talk when nobody listened to you for years. 

Jongin had a crush on him, and it was the first time Baekhyun had ever experienced something like that, to feel like someone wanted him.

 _“Cute, Baekhyun.”_ The sixteen year old would say when his shaking hands dropped soda bottles on the ground when the stadium did fireworks, the sound scared him, but Jongin just seemed to think he was a bit skirmish.

It never amounted to anything though, because one night it was very late both of them were just about to close up the concessions stand since they hadn’t had customers in hours.

But Jongin had laughed, jumping around the counter and running up to a group of approaching men.

Of course Jongin had friends, Baekhyun always knew he was social, but it still made him.. a bit envious.

The group that was walking up hardly even looked like Jongin at all though - no laughter, no smiles.

It seemed like a few men in the back were circling just one of the men, a man Jongin had latched onto.

He was large. 

The man had slicked back silver hair and was dressed in clothes that must have cost more than anything Baekhyun owned despite it simply being black jeans and a black, skin tight turtleneck.

“Baekhyun! This is my brother!” 

Baekhyun shook in place when the man removed his hand from his pocket, removing the glasses from his face and it was ironic he even had been wearing them when it was nearly dark.

Then, the corner of the man's lips quirked up, scanning Baekhyun over and he suddenly knew how ridiculous their work outfits looked.

The hideous blue matched with red and orange, but it was still probably better to be seen like this than the rags he wore normally.

Plus, at least Jongin had been dressed the same.

Baekhyun hadn’t ever found people.. interesting in his life, he felt his body break out in a cold sweat because the man eyed him so obviously that he even leaned over the counter to look down at him.

He hoped he didn’t notice the holes in his shoes.

“Why hello there.” He finally spoke, a deep, raspy tone that was more growling than a simple sentence, putting his hand out over the counter politely.

“B-Baekh-yun. Byun Bae- yeah. Um..” He shoved a chunk of hair out of his eyes before giving his hand over, hoping it wasn’t as clammy as his entire body felt.

“Get me a drink, Jonginnie,” The man called over Baekhyun’s shoulder before his almond shaped eyes were back on Baekhyun, licking the corner of his mouth before bringing Baekhyun’s fingers to his mouth.

He pressed a chaste kiss to his knuckles and Baekhyun’s heart was pounding hard in his ears and he felt he might have an anxiety attack right where he stood because he could feel the smallest warmth of saliva from the man's lips and swallowed hard. “Chanyeol. How old are you, honeybee?” 

Baekhyun knew his face was bright red and saw the man smirk, he had to sit back, he snatched his hand away and grabbed the edge of the counter, breath catching.

“Oh. Shy,” Chanyeol mused, ducking his head down to catch Baekhyun’s eyes once more, “I can deal with that, little one.” 

He wasn’t exactly _shy_ , more like… extremely nervous.

His social anxiety was horrible when put on the spot. 

Baekhyun swallowed hard though, wrapping his arm around his stomach because it was twisting so badly it _hurt_.

He swore Chanyeol's eyes flicked a bit worriedly, but he didn’t say a thing - didn’t have time to.

Because Jongin was smashing a soda bottle between them with a huge smile, “Pay up, Yeol!” He cried, putting his palm out for money.

Chanyeol snickered then, pulling out his wallet, “Like you need any more money, little brother. You’ll be in training soon enough, won’t need money.” 

Baekhyun was too busy trying to catch his breath to understand or care about what they were talking about, but when a hand grabbed his off the counter he jumped.

If Chanyeol noticed, he didn’t say a thing.

“How old are you?” He repeated, shoving a bunch of cash into his hand, “Baekhyun.” 

It was weird to be acknowledged, Baekhyun still wasn’t used to it at all.

“Se-seventeen.” 

Chanyeol's lip twitched downward and Baekhyun felt like he had something to apologize for.

But didn’t know what. 

“I see,” Chanyeol said instead, closing Baekhyun fingers around the money, “Keep the change - Jongin, lets go.” 

“Bye, Baek! See you.. soon!” Jongin didn’t sound very confident in that, but Baekhyun nodded without a word anyways.

“And.. Byun Baekhyun.” Chanyeol looked over his shoulder at him, “I hope you’re just as cute next time we meet.” 

Baekhyun dumbly nodded, and as soon as the man was out of sight dropped to his bottom behind the counter, pressing his face in his knees with a shaky breath.

Never in his life had he ever felt like a complete idiot. 

But he cried purely because he hated his incompetence.

~~~~~~

Jongin ended up not working the next summer. Or the one after that.

Baekhyun had a good amount of money saved up, now nineteen he felt he had a good amount to get out.

Before it was suddenly time. 

When he was younger he never understood the implications, the _not yet_ was just a phrase that sent shivers down his spine.

But now he knew.

He knew that it didn’t matter how good he was at housekeeping, how smart he was, how he had gotten a part scholarship to a nearby university - his father refused to pay the other half with a hit across his face for suggesting it - he was always going to be sold.

His body would be at least.

Baekhyun didn’t want to be there for it. 

He hadn’t even had his first kiss, he could barely even look people in the eyes, he couldn’t.. couldn't sleep with someone.

Much less old perverts, ones who had preyed on him even when he was merely thirteen years old and simply wanted praise for passing math class.

Baekhyun just knew he had to leave before it became too much, he hadn’t seen his father home in weeks and it was good - and bad - because he wasn’t sure when one of the sleazy men would come by.

He was correct in assuming they would though.

Because he had a duffle on his shoulder and everything he cared about when he stepped onto the dark sidewalk.

He had enough that he could stay a while at a hotel - anywhere was better than staying home alone.

Maybe he’d go back once his father was home, pray that he was only feeling so anxious because he was… well, paranoid.

But, he felt like someone was following him.

Baekhyun was an overly anxious person, so he rode it off as his anxiety and nerves because after all it was well past dark and he was walking all alone, with everything he owned.

But, he couldn’t shake it off after a few more minutes, walking faster and faster, moving his duffle strap so it was across his chest rather than on just one shoulder - more secure.

His heart was pounding and he could feel his eyes glossing over.

Baekhyun swallowed hard, worn tennis shoes stomping hard on the pavement when he looked to his right, looking through the reflection in a bakery window.

There was a black, tinted window car.

He didn’t think much - tried not too, but when he turned to walk down a street instead of continuing straight on - it turned too.

Baekhyun panicked, he leaned over his knees because his head was pounding.

Then, he took off in a run.

_“Get him!”_

_“Corner him!”_

_“Don’t let him get away!”_


	2. My heart was pumping, chest was screaming, air was freezing

Baekhyun didn’t think he had ever run so fast in his life, ever.

He was thin, usually malnourished, had panic or anxiety attacks at the drop of a hat.

So, no. No, he was not athletic.

Which explained how easily he had gotten caught.

Arms wrapped around his waist and he immediately burst into a sob, fingers moving to hold his shirt down, wiggling and kicking.

“Please! Pl-please! Please!” 

His muscles ached with how much he was scrambling, kicking.

His captor just lifted his hips up, holding his arms down at his sides and Baekhyun wailed, flailing and begging, tears streaming down his face.

But he couldn’t breathe, his chest was tightening as if someone was stepping on his chest.

“S-s- pl-please! B-air!” 

His breath was coming out as a wheeze, but his heart was racing.

_He was dying._

_He was going to choke to death and die right here in an alley that smelled of piss._

It felt like his entire body was trembling when he lost all strength, coughing out sobs and trying to scratch at his throat, his hands couldn’t reach up to grab his throat and he tried harder.

Then a hand was placed over his mouth and he felt his entire body scream, fight or flight as he couldn’t get any air in, his body had no strength.

_And he was dying._

“Hey! Let him go! Put him down!” 

Baekhyun was too busy trying to figure out how not to pass out and get raped in this alley, too busy catching himself on his elbows when his captor dropped him. 

“Didn’t tell you to fucking scare him, Sehun!” 

“Didn’t say not to,” His captor replied. 

Baekhyun wheezed, and if he had anything in his stomach it would have been thrown up, he pushed himself towards the wall more, curling up into a fetal position and screeching a choking noise at the duffle bag strap around his neck.

“Everyone get back to the car! Now!” 

His nails scratched at his neck, kicking his legs out in panic and heart only beginning to calm with his deep and painful breaths.

And then there was a figure knelt down in front of him, reaching for the strap around his neck and Baekhyun wailed, snot running down his nose and flinching back, “P-ple- don’t- touch! No- r-rape- pleease!”

Baekhyun’s hand was pushed to the side though and he couldn’t focus his eyes, only crying harder as the duffle was taken - the only things he had inside.

He’d still rather be robbed than raped.

“P-pl-please! Bre-can’t- air!” 

“Hey. Hey, Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun flinched again, smacking his cheek into the wall before wincing and crying harder as his hand came up to grab his face, shielding with his arms. 

“Hey!” The voice barked again.

Baekhyun whimpered when his arms were ripped away, being restrained in a hard grip.

“Look at me, look at me right now.” 

He did, terrified of what was going to happen if he didn’t.

Panic was still present, very much so, but he hadn’t seen this man in so, so long that it was insane - nearly three years. 

Chanyeol looked aged, definitely so. He had thin wrinkle lines around his mouth like he frowned constantly or carried a stern expression, facial hair grown out into stubble and his face looked sharpened, thinner.

His hair was now deep black and wavy, falling onto his forehead in what appeared more youthful than it had been slicked back and neat.

But it wasn’t really. It gave a shadow to his eyes that casted all across his face, hiding his features in what appeared menacing.

His eyes weren’t as Baekhyun remembered, he couldn’t read them at all and it made him struggle against his hands then - useless when he was weak and the man was huge.

Chanyeol didn’t look as he recalled, didn’t feel the same.

Back then Baekhyun had concluded after days of denial that this was the first person he’d ever felt any sort of attraction for.. any sort of feeling that gave him hope.

He felt pathetic after realizing though, because he’d never seen the man ever again.

He was just scared now, terrified and trying to get his hands out of his grip.

“Hey! What are you doing!” Chanyeol growled, and it wasn’t nearly as sweet a tone as Baekhyun recalled, “Stop! Now!”

Baekhyun sobbed, leaning forward so his head hung limp on his shoulders, but stopped struggling because there was no _fucking_ point anymore.

“P-pl- don't r-rape me! T-tha- all I have!” He cried, sniffing his running nose.

“Not going to fucking rape you, just breathe,” Chanyeol said, not an order, but also not nice in the slightest, hand moving to the back of Baekhyun’s neck, “I see you remember me.” 

Baekhyun couldn’t give a response, physically couldn’t find words. 

“I certainly… certainly remember you,” The man continued, “Not like this. But well enough.” 

Chanyeol gave a chuckle after his words and Baekhyun didn’t know if it was supposed to be a joke or not, but he didn’t think it was funny at all and coughed wetly, putting a hand out to push the other man’s palm out of his face.

“Hey, don’t push me! Did you just push me?” 

Baekhyun felt a hand grab his chin and yank his head up and he trembled, shaking.

“Let’s get one thing straight, you don’t fucking put your hands on me. Got it?” 

His breath was starting up all over again at the tone, not time to respond and the hand on his chin tightened, waiting for a response.

Baekhyun burst with one, coughing, “Bre-pani-breathe! Dying! D-Dying!” He wheezed, flailing back out of Chanyeol's hand to turn sideways and press his face into the wall, nails scratching the dirty brick, “A-Air!” 

Chanyeol didn’t say a thing or touch him until his breathing mellowed out, until he was whispering and tapping fingers on the wall, murmuring words to calm himself down.

The man just watched with an unreadable expression, crouched down onto his elbows with Baekhyun’s bag under his knees.

“One two three, breathe, it’s okay. Breathing is good,” Baekhyun whispered to himself, face in the wall, legs under his chin, “Safe one day, safe today. Safe soon.” 

“Okay, Baekhyun.” 

His name was more of a sigh rather than an irritated hiss, but his shoulders still pulled together, chest still moving to press into the cold and dirty brick.

“It’s time for us to go. I’m tired of sitting here, it fucking stinks.” Chanyeol continued with a scrunched nose of disgust, throwing Baekhyun’s bag onto his shoulder and standing up.

Baekhyun turned to look from the corner of his eye, not saying a word and holding his knee that he only now realized was throbbing, probably because the first man who grabbed him had dropped him right on it.

“Well?” The man asked, raising a brow and shaking his hand out towards Baekhyun, “Come on. I have all your things, don’t think you’re going anywhere without them. We have a lot to discuss…. unless, of course you want to just sit here and let the drunkards take care of you.” 

His throat burned from all his crying, shakily standing up only to limp, watching Chanyeol's eyes flick to his leg before the man raised his head a bit higher, a blank expression. “W-wh-why?” 

He sounded hoarse, quiet, terrified. 

Baekhyun had been, literally, backed into a wall and his only choice was to wrap his fingers around Chanyeol's.

“We can discuss when we get there,” Chanyeol brushed off, pulling him along and Baekhyun hissed with every step he took, face still pounding and feeling like any second he was just going to fall face first into the cement.

Chanyeol held the door and made him climb in first, settling him in the middle seat - a man with orange hair blocking the other door so it wasn’t like Baekhyun could get out - he had no reason to when all his things were in Chanyeol's hands.

The man then threw an arm across his shoulder and yanked him more into his side than awkwardly in the middle and Baekhyun cried harder, bringing his sleeve up to his face. 

“No more questions until I request you,” Chanyeol ordered then, eyeing his temple, “You’ll need to be cleaned before you step into my office.”

Baekhyun had no idea what that meant, but when he pulled his knees into the seat to hide in them nobody said a thing.

~~~~~~

Chanyeol hadn’t said a word the entire time they had been in the car, and all thoughts of running away were shattered because Baekhyun had no idea where they were.

They had driven a half hour from the city, the only place he’d ever known, and passed through two sets of gates to reveal the huge house.

It was a mansion if Baekhyun had ever seen one, but at the same time he had lived in a home so worn down every year he had to move his bed away from holes in the ceiling when it rained.

So, his opinion didn’t matter much. 

What did matter though was who opened the door.

Baekhyun was dead on his feet, eyes raw but when he saw the tall, tanned man he cried again, threw himself into his chest because he had been the only person he’d ever known, his only friend.

“I-Jon-Jongin!” 

“Hey, hey, Baek. So happy to see you.” Jongin had aged well and still had the kind smile he did when they met, cupped the back of his hair to hug him back, tighter.

Baekhyun’s nails probably dug into the man's skin with how tightly he was holding him to cry.

“What the hell did you do, Yeol? Fuck, he’s shaking and freezing. I knew I should have got him myself.” Jongin hissed over his head and Baekhyun, while scared, found comfort in being defended.

“Let go of him,” Is all Chanyeol answered, shedding off his coat, “Kyungsoo, take him to his room. I want him cleaned up and sent to my office.”

“It’s fucking … it's three in the morning!”

“Do it.”

Baekhyun heard a sigh as Jongin reluctantly let him go, grabbing his shoulder and steering him to face a smaller man, about the same size as him, only built muscular and not his scrawny size. “Baekhyun, this is Kyungsoo, my fiancé. He’ll take good care of you.” 

Baekhyun had so many questions - so many because Jongin must be what eighteen? Maybe nineteen? Why and how did he have a fiancé so soon.

It wasn’t his business though and he was so exhausted. 

“Hello,” Kyungsoo had a pretty smile, but Baekhyun couldn’t find it in him to acknowledge it as the man started pulling him up stairs, his knee stung but he didn’t say anything. “You’re just as cute as Jongin said you were. He says you guys were best friends back in the day, wished to see you a lot before he had to go to stealth training.” 

Baekhyun just wrung his shirt between his fingers and the other man cooed at him, rubbing his arm.

“Anyway,” He continued cheerfully, “This bedroom will be yours,” He pushed it open, “Chanyeol's is right across, Jongin and I are…”

He wasn’t really listening at all because the room was gorgeous.

Everything was white and edged in silver, the walls were a light blue and the dark wooden floors were shining. 

Baekhyun wanted to look around, betraying his head telling him to run.

“-so, shower quickly and put these clothes on,” Kyungsoo shoved a handful of clothes into his chest, “And then I’ll bring you downstairs.”

  
~~~~~~~

It had gone exactly as Kyungsoo said, he showered - sobbing until he heard the man yell that Chanyeol was an impatient man - then he changed into the pajamas and was led downstairs.

The clothes given were admittedly nice, soft cotton shorts and a long, flowing red button down pajama top. 

Baekhyun just wanted to sleep forever at this point, but what was new?

“Take a seat.” 

He was instantly on high alert when Kyungsoo shut the door behind Baekhyun and didn’t follow, but he rushed to do what Chanyeol instructed, taking a seat across from the man.

He was too tired to even look around, too nervous, so he stared at his fingers in his lap instead, glancing at the bruise spread on his knee and knew his temple was a bit splotchy also.

That was fine, he could handle pain.

“You can eat those.” Chanyeol spoke up again, making him jump.

Baekhyun glanced up just to see what the man was talking about and saw a tray of sweets on the table to his left along with a glass of water.

He swallowed hard and looked away, stomach aching.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Chanyeol was standing up now, walking across the room and Baekhyun had to watch fearfully, needing to be aware of what he was doing. “I have an important job for you, can’t have you passing out. They’re clean. I didn’t even make them, our chef did.” 

Baekhyun’s stomach rumbled, practically forcing him to reach out for a muffin.

Chanyeol chuckled, walking around a large round desk to grab a glass of brownish liquid.

It was a little late to be drinking.

“So. Let me tell you a story, baby.” 

Baekhyun’s chest reacted instantly to the nickname, speeding up and causing him to pull his knees closer.

“... your father, a heartless man, huh?” Chanyeol sounded overly amused as he walked back to his chair, sitting on the edge, “What’s he done to you, I wonder?”

He waited a moment to see if Baekhyun would respond, but the smaller only turned his head away to get more snacks, holding them in his shirt.

He must have looked like a starving animal, and he kind of was.

“My father took over this side of the city, Parks - have you heard of them?”

The name resonated somewhere in the back of his mind but he gave a small shake of his head.

Chanyeol looked put off and slightly annoyed at that, clicking his tongue, “Well. Then I guess you are just as pure as expected…” He mused to himself before throwing his feet up onto the coffee table, the sound made Baekhyun scoot further back into the couch cushion. “I’m in charge now, and have been for two years. Your father got caught one too many times, Baekhyun. In fact, he never had the money he said he was going to fess up - all the money he made on our territory. We calculated it out, estimated - a bit of a tax fee added of course just because I was so annoyed, and let me tell you, honeybee. Well… it’s worth more than he could ever have in a lifetime, no matter how much coke he sells, how many pills…” 

Baekhyun had never heard someone speak of his father's drug business before, he pushed it out of his mind when in society; so he gulped, looking down at his lap and picking at crumbs.

“What a better idea than to take his pretty son? I knew who you were as soon as I saw you, so hot. Unfortunately, I’m really not into minors. So, I gave it some time, tried to allow him to work it off.

It was his idea first, so don’t be so shocked.” 

His eyes glossed over as he pulled his face together.

Sure, his father had never been right to him, had never been warm or loving.

But did he deserve to be given away like this? He was still a person.

Baekhyun swallowed back his panic because he shouldn’t have really expected any differently when he was positive that the _not yet_ was going to be a _go ahead_ any day now.

But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

“He- why…” Baekhyun swallowed hard and could have sworn he saw Chanyeol glance away when a tear rolled down his face, “... w-what will I do? Um.. I-I can cle-clean. Cook..” 

Chanyeol snorted like it was the funniest thing he had heard in awhile, shoulders shaking, “Oh, baby.” He chuckled, “You’re much too pretty to be doing such hard work. So, I’ve made an even better arrangement. You ready?” 

He didn’t move.

“You, my pet, are going to be my… I guess you can say whore, lover…whatever you want to say.”

“P-Partners?” Baekhyun cried, wiping his eyes.

Chanyeol shrugged, pulling his glass to his lips and giving him a long look, “Guess we’ll see now won’t we?” 

Baekhyun had never even had his first kiss before, he’d never really spoken to someone sexually or romantically, he’d never… had hands on his skin other than his own.

There was no way he could satisfy such a man.

He cried silently and didn’t know what was worse - being a man's unaffectionate whore or living on the streets. 

“There will be lotions, medicine, razors, all necessities in your room by the end of the week,” Chanyeol muttered, eyeing the smaller man that was crying softly into his palm, “At least you’re safer here than on the streets, right, pretty?”

Baekhyun didn’t know that yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear Chanyeol is actually soft as hell


	3. I've got all these demons hiding underneath, nobody can see them, nobody but me

He didn’t really see Chanyeol much the next two days, but those were also spent crying, unmoving even when Jongin or Kyungsoo came to check on him.

As true to his word though, Chanyeol had given a huge gift box full of things, even the clothing from his duffle and more items still with tags on them.

He had used the strawberry scented conditioner for the first time after opening the box because it was expensive and he’d never had something like it before, his hair was now softer than he’d ever had it in his life. But, the box also sent him some red flags.

The bottles of lube that were sitting in the bottom, a package of condoms, wax and razors.

It stung Baekhyun’s chest because even though he wasn’t on the streets he felt he had little choice in the matter.

At least Chanyeol was attractive, he tried to reason, at least he was a handsome man and was only twenty five, six years his senior.

At least he wasn’t a pervy old man that stunk of marijuana and sweat.

Baekhyun had always known he’d lose his virginity this way, but at least this wasn’t rape - he wouldn’t let it be. He’d try to get along with Chanyeol, hoping the man wouldn’t take him forcefully.

Jongin said he wouldn’t at least, that Chanyeol might seem bad, but he’s really not all that tough.

Baekhyun wondered if the prescription bottles of vitamins he had been given in his gift box were an example of that, if all the hair and skin products were his way of.. trying to earn his attention? 

He didn’t know.

“Hey?” 

Baekhyun turned to look at Sehun, the orange haired man peeking around the corner.

He swallowed hard and shoved his hands between his knees, fingers shaking in his seat at the table, because this was the man that had grabbed him so tightly, had laid a hand over his mouth and nearly suffocated him.

“Chanyeol wanted to see you.” The man continued, shuffling slightly in the doorway, “Can I.. uh, talk to you really quick?” 

It wasn’t like he had a choice anyways, so Baekhyun gave a stiff nod, beginning to clean up his space so the maids wouldn’t have too much work.

“Just wanted…” Sehun sighed, walking more into the dining room to look at him, “I’m really sorry about… you know, scaring you so much. I didn’t know about your um.. your issue. So, yeah, sorry about that. Chanyeol told our doctor, Yixing, and he explained to me how.. painful those attacks can be. He kicked some sense into me and you don’t need to worry. I won’t do that again.” 

Baekhyun’s eyes flickered in surprise, red coloring his cheeks as he nodded his head quickly, pushing out his chair to hold his arms around himself, “I-it's okay.. painful, yeah. Couldn’t.. breathe, can’t breathe when… holding like that…” 

The man looked really apologetic then, nodding and licking his lips before bowing his head, “Really sorry. It won’t be happening again, Baekhyun. I hope we can.. get along better in the future.” 

Baekhyun didn’t really have a response to that and gave a tight lipped smile instead, twiddling with his shirt as he walked around Sehun and began towards Chanyeol's study.

He swore this was the only place the man ever was.

It was a good thing though because Baekhyun didn’t need to worry about running into him all that much.

The door was slightly cracked already and Baekhyun slipped through, sighing as he shut the door softly with a small click.

“There you are. Avoiding me, are we?” 

He hadn’t been necessarily avoiding per say - more like hiding.

“Come here, let's see that pretty face.” 

Despite it being a command, Baekhyun found his cheeks pinken because he liked to be complimented. It was hard not to like it when he’d never had much of any compliments before.

Everyone loved to be praised.

“Come along, come along,” Chanyeol crooned, hand raised out towards him and wiggling his fingers, “Such a slow walker, Baekhyun.” 

Baekhyun was going at a slug like pace, licking his lips nervously and moving to stand beside Chanyeol's chair.

The man almost instantly was draping an arm around his back, turning him around to face him and soothing his hands over his hips.

It wasn’t as scary as Baekhyun thought it’d be.

Chanyeol didn’t have the look of lust in his eyes, he didn’t look very interested in looking at more than his face… he just looked… exhausted.

“What’d you do today?” Chanyeol asked, moving hands off Baekhyun’s hips to grab both hands in his, massaging over his palms.

“I-uh..” Baekhyun hadn’t really done anything today, nothing at all really, “... put clothes a-away.” He settled on awkwardly.

Chanyeol only snorted though, bringing Baekhyun’s hands up to his shoulder and leaving them there, moving his own down his arms to his ribs.

“All I did today was sort paperwork. Our drug trade expanded three percent from two months ago, isn’t that nice?”

Baekhyun really didn’t know, but he also didn’t have time to answer because Chanyeol was pulling him down into his lap.

He yelped, gasping and grabbing the man's shirt between his fingers as he sat onto Chanyeol's thighs, breathing a deep breath through his nose to keep calm.

“Comfy?” 

Baekhyun didn’t reply, nervously avoiding Chanyeol's eyes until the man was grabbing his cheek softly, running the tips of his fingers over the light speckled bruising on his face.

Chanyeol clicked his tongue, “I’ll get you cream for that too.” 

“O-Okay.” He whispered, breath stuck in his throat.

It made the elder man smile to have a response though, just a small upturn of the corner of his lips as he let go of Baekhyun’s cheek.

Up this close he could see Chanyeol really was handsome.

Big dark brown almond eyes, a high nose, a pair of plump lips. It didn’t help that he was also so huge, smelled of fresh coffee and old books.

He just looked so tired though, the bags under his eyes spoke as much and his skin seemed somewhat dull.

Baekhyun could understand what lack of sleep was.

“I’m going to kiss you.” 

His chest stopped moving, eyes stopped roaming and spine went stiff.

“I want to kiss you.” Chanyeol murmured, scratching his spine through his shirt, “Just giving you a warning.” He added.

Baekhyun swallowed hard, a confession on the tip of his tongue, but he didn’t have any time to figure out how to say it without stumbling like an idiot because Chanyeol was tilting his chin down.

He first pressed a kiss to the corner of the smallers mouth before an actual one to the center of his lips, grabbing his chin a bit higher to separate Baekhyun’s bottom lip to fit his own between the youngers.

He didn’t move at all, didn’t know how, didn’t know if he could breathe, _was it weird?_ _Was he doing okay?_ He felt stiff, he wasn’t moving his mouth how Chanyeol was and could still taste coffee on his lips, a tinge of hazelnut on his mouth.

“You going to respond, baby?” Chanyeol laughed against his lips, looking at him.

Baekhyun’s heart picked up.

He should’ve known he’d be bad. He should’ve known and should have told the man. He should have told him he had just eaten breakfast and probably tasted gross. That he didn’t know where to put his hands and if he could breathe - wasn’t he supposed to turn his head so they didn’t smash noses? He didn’t know.

“Hey, hey. Shush.” The hand on the nape of his neck was pulling him into Chanyeol's shoulder, pulling his body closer, “Breathe, breathe. Nothings happening to you.”

Baekhyun didn’t even realize he was near a panic attack, pressing his chin into Chanyeol's shoulder and he didn’t know if it was okay, but he wrapped his arms tight around the man's neck. 

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong? It’s only a peck. It was a small kiss, are you okay? Breathe. I’ll take you to get medicine, I’ll get you some medicine if you just tell me. Tell me anything so I can help you.”

“A-Anxie-ty!” He hissed, breathing hard into Chanyeol's ear.

“Okay. Okay. I’ll get you medicine. I will and you’ll have it as soon as tomorrow. Soon, baby. Come on, honeybee, just breathe.”

Chanyeol sounded more like he was soothing a sobbing child rather than simply trying to get Baekhyun to stop breathing hard, rubbing his back and even patting at his tailbone.

Baekhyun wondered if he was trying to put him to sleep, because it nearly worked, ten minutes later he was only focusing on breathing and lying limp on the man's chest. 

“So you have anxiety and panic attacks,” Chanyeol mumbled into his shoulder later after a very long silence, “There’s no issues. We can work on it.” 

That nearly had Baekhyun in tears and he turned his head the other way to stare at the bookshelf on the wall.

He’d always thought there was something completely fucked up and wrong with him.

Why couldn’t he just talk to people?

Why couldn’t he sleep throughout the nights? 

Why did he feel so scared when asked to meet people?

Why couldn’t he just be _normal_?

“I-I’m sorry.” Baekhyun sat back to try and climb off Chanyeol's lap, sure the man probably was embarrassed of him and wanted him off.

But Chanyeol grunted in disapproval, wrapping both arms around his waist to hold him still, pressing his chin into Baekhyun’s stomach to look up at him, studying.

“Sorry. I’ll… go now,” He whispered, avoiding Chanyeol's eyes. 

“It was your first kiss?” Chanyeol's mouth parted as he came to that conclusion based on the red of Baekhyun’s face and his bashfulness, “Oh god. Baby. Baby, I didn’t know.” 

Baekhyun licked his lips and gave a small nod as he looked down at his shirt.

“Fuck,” Chanyeol growled, but he sounded so happy, “Pure angel. Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on you. Don’t worry that pretty head.” 

The younger buried his nose into Chanyeol's shirt, embarrassed, curling his arms around his own stomach and pushing into the man's chest. 

All Chanyeol did was hum, standing up and moving towards the couch on the other side of the room. 

Baekhyun looked over his back curiously, legs being held by the man's palms and in a way he felt… protected?

He didn’t trust Chanyeol, he had absolutely no reason to yet, but… he’d never been held before, much less by a man so strong.

He couldn’t even ever remember as a child his father picking him up. 

It was nice. 

“Take a nap,” And back was the demanding tone Chanyeol seemed to keep up on, setting him down into the leather couch and pulling his shirt down over the small sliver of exposed skin. “Sleep.” 

Baekhyun didn’t think being told what to do was so bad because he could really use a nap right now.

******

There were actually a lot more people in the mansion than he thought.

It turned out he had yet to even explore an entire side of it until he had been led to the infirmary days before to speak to their live in doctor. 

Yixing was kind, but it still hadn’t helped Baekhyun’s shakiness to talk about his anxiety.

In fact, Baekhyun had mostly denied knowing the cause of his anxiety and panic because he didn’t want to talk much.

He could tell Yixing didn’t believe a word of his excuses though, but never called him out on it.

Even Jongin, when he had come by to lead him back to the main area of the house sounded suspicious of Baekhyun’s stumbling excuses.

Baekhyun just didn’t know anyone in this house enough to tell them, and it didn’t really help that he’d go days without seeing Chanyeol even though the man had treated him so nicely and ordered the doctor to find the right medications for Baekhyun. 

He was a busy, busy man and Baekhyun should have expected as much. 

He didn’t know what to feel though.

Last he saw Chanyeol was a week after the very awkward kiss and it had only been a swift head nod because the man had looked pissed and been on the phone.

Moments after Baekhyun let himself slide out, face red from embarrassment for not knocking and he hadn’t even known _why_ he tried to visit the man anyways.

He was just so curious.

Wondering why Chanyeol had bothered to let him sleep as long as possible on his couch, why he found a furry blanket over him.

Maybe he just didn’t want his new fuck toy to die so soon, Baekhyun scoffed under his breath.

It seemed plausible.

“Where do they always go?” Baekhyun asked, looking at Sehun across the table.

“They just ran to do a check. It’s easier if Chanyeol goes because if people get caught red handed selling on our territory their faces are hysterical when Chanyeol catches them.” 

“Do… has he a-always sell?”

“Yeah. I mean, his parents passed away a while back, so it’s only natural. After all, he’s really not doing too bad of things… you know, just a few drug markets.. he refuses to get into more extreme things like… human trafficking or like.. I don’t know, dog fighting.” Sehun gave a small shrug, “I don’t know; just drugs have kept us all wealthy this long. Whatever he decides is usually the best decision. Have a little faith in him.” 

_Have a little faith._

Baekhyun nearly laughed under his breath because he was the one that had been taken without a choice - exchanged like a piece of meat.

He didn’t really know what to think.

“I am.. his whore.” He replied, voice quiet because he heard footsteps walking into the dining room behind him.

“No you’re not.” Arms wrapped around his shoulders and Baekhyun jumped high before he saw the tan of the man's arms, “You’re really not, Baek. Chanyeol won’t do shit if you express not wanting it.” 

Baekhyun sighed, “Will he kick me out?”

“No. Absolutely not,” Jongin assured, pulling out a chair beside him, “Really. You’re here because you’re my friend and I always knew something shady was going on around you, so when we heard about your father… I suggested we make a deal, get you safe. _Technically_ what he told you is the deal, that’s what was on paper and given to your father, but… it’s really not like that. Plus, you ever have a problem come tell us and we’ll talk some sense into his empty head.”

Baekhyun sucked his lip into his mouth with a tiny nod.

At least he finally was getting attention, even if it scared him more than anything.   
  


~~~~~~

  
A knock sounded on his bedroom door just as he was drying his hair off with a towel, but he didn’t have much time to respond before a head was poking inside.

“Hey.” Chanyeol locked eyes on him, “Mind if I come in?”

Baekhyun gulped and nodded, standing up to rush towards his bathroom and throw his towel inside, shutting the door before Chanyeol could see his unorganized mess on the counter.

“Just wanted to check on you. It’s been a while.” 

It had been a while, and Baekhyun felt a bit… neglected? Offended? .. curious?

He didn’t know exactly why, but it was kind of annoying. Chanyeol wanted to be nice to him but then left for a while.

“Heard you got some medicine.” 

Baekhyun started walking back towards the bed, looking surprised when he noticed Chanyeol sitting by the headboard, reading his bottle of medicine.

“Yixing… gave me a-a basic… um.. Prozac is.. common.” He mumbled, staring at his bed awkwardly.

Chanyeol noticed and laughed, his hair hanging over his eyes in what Baekhyun once thought was scary.

But now, when the man was dressed in a tank top and plaid pajama bottoms he looked just like anyone else.

“Come on,” Chanyeol demanded with a grin, “Let me give you some attention. I’ve been gone awhile.”

Baekhyun chewed his bottom lip as he climbed onto the bed, making his way closer towards the headboard before the elder must have gotten impatient and grabbed under his arms.

He squeaked, grabbing Chanyeol's arms tightly when he was pulled up to the headboard, forced into the mans lap to sit sideways where, once again, Baekhyun was reminded how small Chanyeol could make him feel because the man held him like a baby, even going as far as to lean him back with his arm a bit and drape the other across his hips.

“You know the thing I don’t like about these sorts of medicines though?” 

Baekhyun’s face was scarlett when Chanyeol started combing his damp hair with his fingers, “.. what?”

“They can possibly decrease sex drive - or even make it hard to orgasm.” 

His heartbeat picked up and he didn’t know if it was possible for medication to work so soon, or if he just.. didn’t feel like huddling in a ball on the floor.

“Guess we can find out in a few weeks, hm?”

Baekhyun’s mouth felt dry as he sat up so instead of being cradled he sat sideways between Chanyeol's legs, legs draped over the man's right one, “I’ve never… um…”

Chanyeol’s eyes positively glittered, “An orgasm?”

“No. I-uh… hands…” He whispered, pointing at Chanyeol's hand - the man instantly grabbed his palm in his when it was close, “Touching..”

“You’ve never been touched,” If anything Chanyeol sounded elated, squeezing his fingertips, “But you’ve touched yourself before right?” 

Baekhyun gave a tiny nod, moving his hands to rest in his lap and avoiding Chanyeol's eyes.

That didn’t seem to sit well with the man at all though, because in less than a minute Chanyeol had his head resting against the pillows comfortably, his knees spread to allow the elder to lay across his body.

Baekhyun giggled, a tiny, soft breath of air before pressing his lips closed, eyes widening the tiniest bit.

“You like this position?” Chanyeol's mouth was curled up into a slight smile on one side, elbows resting over Baekhyun’s shoulders and petting his bangs back, “I like that noise. Don’t be scared to laugh.” 

He’d never been told that before, if anything he always had to be pretty quiet at his father's home, scared of drawing too much attention.

It sounded nice.

“How’d you touch yourself, baby?” Chanyeol asked then, leaning down to peck his forehead, “I need to know how to take care of you.”

Baekhyun thought he’d feel dirty ever having to talk about something like this, thought he’d feel filthy or even turned on.

But he didn’t, and Chanyeol didn’t look it either.

If anything, he made it feel like a normal topic for conversation. 

Baekhyun wasn’t even good at normal conversation, so this felt just as odd as any other.

“I’m. I…”

“Don’t be shy with me,” The elder requested, breath fanning his face, “It’s important we talk.” 

“Just.. I-I in showers… sometimes… just.. h-hands.” 

“Ah,” Chanyeol hummed, bringing Baekhyun’s palms up and pressing his flat onto the smallers, showing off the difference in their hands, “You finger yourself too? Tell me, honeybee.” 

He gulped, nodding slightly.

Chanyeol grinned though, something twinkling in his eye as he grabbed Baekhyun’s fingers, “These very fingers? How small, gorgeous. I bet you take three of them, hm?” He pressed a kiss to his fingertips, pressing them against plush lips for seconds.

Baekhyun’s breath caught, but it wasn’t from anxiety or embarrassment, it was just.. shock.

All of this felt so new.

“Two..”

“Two?” Chanyeol looked shocked too, “That’s all? Oh. You’re killing me, darling. That’s like… one of my fingers. That’s all? My sweet little one. Don’t worry, when the time comes we’ll be very careful.” 

_When was the time going to come though?_

Baekhyun was nervous every time he saw Chanyeol because he didn’t know if it was time. If he’d shaved that day, if he’d cleaned himself well enough, if he wore nice underwear.

He didn’t even know if Chanyeol cared about any of these things.

_Why did he care about his preferences at all in the first place?_

“Anyways,” The elder whispered like they hadn’t been talking about Baekhyun fingering himself to orgasm or touching himself, “You look very lovely today. Thought you should know,” He cooed like he was listing, “There is a pool on the side of the house I’d like to show you soon, and I’d like to give you a kiss - as long as that’s okay with you.” 

The second time this mob leader had asked him for a kiss.

_Shouldn’t Chanyeol just take what he wants? Isn’t that how it works?_

“Just a tiny peck would help me sleep,” The man claimed dramatically.

So dramatic that Baekhyun giggled under his breath, a bit of his teeth on display from the smallest of smiles on his lips.

“Okay.”

“Thank you, beautiful.”

And once again Baekhyun got to experience the taste of another mouth, only this time Chanyeol's hand was holding his cheek, pecking at his lips and he attempted to reciprocate.

Which just consisted of him parting his lips so Chanyeol could slot them together, and of him puckering his lips in what probably was childish because he felt the man chuckle, but didn’t say a thing. 

It was all lips, not tongue, no touching.

Purely innocent as Chanyeol had implied his want of it to be. 

“Was.. it too bad?”

Baekhyun hoped he didn’t sound as scared as he really was to know Chanyeol's answer. 

“Not at all,” He sighed a breath of relief, hiding his face in Chanyeol's jaw. “Very good, baby. Much better, such a sweet kisser.”

He flushed.

Baekhyun laid in bed all night wondering about Chanyeol's words, about the taste of hazelnut on his mouth and large, rough hands manhandling him around. 

He squealed and buried his face into his pillows because he shouldn’t be having naughty thoughts about a stranger. 


	4. I remember where we started, I remember how you looked

“My father started this business because he used to be on the streets.”

Baekhyun’s lips parted in surprise, looking across the room with a confused furrow of his brow.

Chanyeol had gotten into the habit of requesting to see him a lot. When he was home, Baekhyun knew they’d be seeing each other often, as the past three weeks that’s all they did.

Usually they spoke, but sometimes they didn’t speak at all for hours, just doing their own things.

Baekhyun liked to read, liked to scroll on Chanyeol's iPad because he’d never had one before and wanted to learn how to use it.

And Chanyeol always, even if they hadn’t spoken the entire day, asked for a kiss, asked to place a peck onto his lips.

He let him.

The mansion was much better than being on the streets, Baekhyun decided, because at least here he was always free to do what he wanted.

Well, he wasn’t really allowed to go past the gates without permission, but that was okay because he wasn’t really interested in it.

Plus he didn’t have any money, still hadn’t gotten it back from Chanyeol.

He wondered if the man would ever give it back.

Truthfully it didn’t matter as everything Chanyeol was doing for him costed much more than he ever had in that duffle, and he felt stupid assuming the cost of living not to be that expensive.

His medication - that although was causing him to have insomnia - did _help_ , and a month of that alone was worth more than he would have spent on a week's worth of food.

So, who was he to complain when he was living amazingly with only the small price of a few kisses?

Where else would he find a room so completely free of bugs, leaks, and silent at night?

“He had gotten my mother pregnant at age sixteen,” Chanyeol continued, walking past the chair he was on and turning around with a small package of cookies, placing it in Baekhyun’s lap before taking a seat on the coffee table in front of him, pulling his sweatpants up his thighs as he spread his knees and leaned forward.

Baekhyun chewed his lip as he forced his eyes away and to focus on the package, “What happened to them?”

“Well, the man they worked for favored him. When he died my father took over, made things much better. Stronger. My dad died two years ago, shot by police. But, he made a name for himself - one I now have. The Phoenix is a bird of reincarnation after all. My father and now me. You heard of me?”

He sounded cocky, raising a brow and waiting his response with a slight smirk.

_Was he trying to impress me?_

“... I- didn’t go out… much… so, no.” 

Chanyeol, if Baekhyun didn’t know any better, he would assume was angry at that, his brow twitched and then forehead crinkled up. 

It got silent for a few minutes, the only sound being Baekhyun messing with his wrapper before he swallowed a bite and looked through his hair, fiddling loudly with his package, “And.. your mom?”

“Ah. She died in childbirth,” Chanyeol shrugged, voice rushed, “Father got Jongin's mother pregnant, but she was.. uh, how do I say this kindly? She overdosed. She was an addict and died when Jongin was like.. eight. I didn’t have a relationship with her at all anyways… I-I hated her, in fact. I was like.. barely a teenager then.”

Baekhyun’s shoulders stiffened because Chanyeol did sound really angry, just pissed off as he spat his hatred. 

He licked his lips awkwardly, unsure of what to do or say when Chanyeol was worked up, but he wasn’t really… afraid.

For once at least.

“My.. mom left when I was l-little…” He whispered, placing the wrapper on the side table and pulling his sweatshirt over his knees.

“You’re still little.” 

Baekhyun blushed, mouth perking up the tiniest bit.

“What else, baby?” Chanyeol cooed, resting his chin on his palms and scanning him.

“Um…” His nose scrunched up in thought, moving to grab the iPad from the side of the chair just to have something to hold, to fiddle with as he avoided Chanyeol's eyes, “Dad… wasn’t very good. J-just went to school.. boring…”

“You’re not boring,” The elder said instantly, “I want to know everything.”

Baekhyun _didn’t_ want him to know everything.

“He wasn’t very good? As expected of a negligent drug pedalar. Tell me, honeybee. Did he hurt you? Leave you alone? My father tended to leave me for days, weeks.” 

Baekhyun’s throat felt like something was stuck in it, like he was choking.

What was he to say when all his life he’d been told not to say anything? Not to talk unless it was required.

_Just shut up and go to your room, Baekhyun!_

_I don’t want to see your face today, go._

_Make yourself useful and never open your mouth around me again._

“Y-Yeah. No g-good..” 

“Hey,” Within a second he had Chanyeol in front of his chair, hands grabbing his ankles softly, rubbing his thumbs beneath his jeans. “Don’t cry. Sh, nothings going to happen; nobody will hurt you anymore.”

He felt like a kid, a child that cried as he played with pencils in his room because he was nosy and got his old cars taken away.

Baekhyun was always too curious.

“Fuck, baby.”

Chanyeol was pulling him out of the chair and into his lap on the floor within seconds, balling up his legs to his chest and pressing his forehead into the back of Baekhyun’s hair, “Shush, Sh. Sweet baby, breathe. I know it hurts, breathe.” 

Fingers were pulling at his sweatshirt then, his breath coming out in pained, scratchy noises as the man removed his top leaving his upper body cold.

But it was welcoming because at least nothing was choking him, weighing him down.

Chanyeol was rubbing across his chest softly, tapping a rhythm into his sternum and Baekhyun focused on that, watching the long digits smooth across his skin.

“That’s enough for today. I think that’s enough. I’m right here. You’re doing really good, so good. Much better than before.” 

“You need water? Need to drink.”

He felt himself be shifted with an arm around his back and when the fingers on his chest disappeared he nearly panicked, teary eyes flickering up to look at something only to catch the piercings in Chanyeol's ears, staring at the small silver studs.

“I got you, got you, honeybee.” 

Chanyeol must think he was a literal baby because the man pressed a glass of water to his mouth and tsked when he reached up to hold it himself.

Baekhyun swallowed the entire glass though, gasping as he turned to place the glass on the floor before his arms instantly went around Chanyeol's shoulder, chest heavy and puffing out warm breaths onto his collarbone.

He felt like a clingy monkey because he just wanted to hang on, locking his fingers behind Chanyeol's neck and shifting to wrap his legs around the man's waist, wiping his wet cheek onto Chanyeol's neck.

“Cute,” Chanyeol whispered, hugging onto his waist so tight they were pulled flush together, “Just relax. I’ll put you to bed if you fall asleep, it’s okay.”

His hands went to Baekhyun’s cheek and the younger whined, turning his head to the side and dodging the hand.

“Ah, pretty baby, let me see.” He ordered, but it was a demand much softer than Baekhyun usually heard from him, somewhere between a suggestion. “Let me see.” 

Baekhyun pulled back with a sniff and Chanyeol looked at his face with a sigh, wiping his face and leaning close to press a kiss to his nose, then a peck to his lips, “I like to talk to you. So let’s work on it so we can talk,” He suggested, petting over his naked spine before looking like he only just realized he had removed Baekhyun’s top.

His eyes trailed over his chest, fingers teasing the hair at the nape of his neck as Baekhyun sniffed, face in a soft frown and red. 

“Let’s get you some more to eat, hm?” Chanyeol settled on next, eyes flickering to Baekhyun’s before pulling him back in to snuggle into his chest, lips resting onto the youngers shoulder. “You did really good today, Baekhyun.”

******

Baekhyun woke up in a rather good mood today.

It wasn’t raining as it had been the past few days, it wasn’t storming, it was still chilly, but that was manageable.

He just felt _good_ for once.

So, he was actually going downstairs at a normal time to join the others for breakfast, usually he was too late and everyone had left already, but not this time, he was on time with his hair sticking up messily and a robe over his pajamas, fuzzy slipper on his toes.

“Look at you!”

Baekhyun blushed at Kyungsoo's cooing and because of the other people around the table.

He knew all of their names by now, but some of them were only here on rare occasions, he suddenly didn’t feel all that good because he was _not_ good with new people, especially ones with narrowed eyes and looking at him calculatingly.

He understood that he was still the new person, he’d only been here just over a month, but it still made him uncomfortable.

But, they had a right to find him suspicious because they were running a _very illegal_ business.

Having grown up in it - even if he didn’t know much about it - he didn’t care.

Whatever made money, and it seemed they had a _ton_.

“My beautiful boy, good morning. Come here.” 

Baekhyun practically ran, bypassing the servants to jump into the seat being offered, he heard people laughing and ducked his head, face red as he chewed on his fingertip nervously, glancing at Chanyeol to see if he’d laugh at him too.

He wasn’t.

The man was only smiling, grabbing the arm of his wooden chair and yanking it against his.

Baekhyun jerked, gasping at the sudden motion, but Chanyeol didn’t seem to notice a thing, only pushing a plate of food in front of him and reaching over to pet his hair.

Maybe Chanyeol was right to call him pet sometimes, because the way he leaned into it was nothing short of a kitten.

“Chanyeol. We had some questionable reports about the fences near our warehouses. One said they suspected police.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Chanyeol wasn’t even looking at Baekhyun but continued to pet his hair, “There’s no way. Not when I paid the last officers that snuck into our warehouse. They’re _well_ aware.” 

Minseok huffed and Baekhyun stiffened because Chanyeol sat back, taking his hand back and eyeing the man across from him like he expected something that would piss him off.

“We.. were wondering if it’s… Byun trying to snoop. Probably ran out of -“

Chanyeol’s hand slammed on the table, shaking all the glasses and Baekhyun released a tiny cry, hiding his nose in his robe, “Byun isn’t _shit!_ He wouldn’t shoot or do anything to our stash, because he’s too fucking doped up to risk exploding it! So what if he sneaks in? In fact, let him! Next time he does tie him up because I have a lot to fucking say to him!”

“Wasn't that part of your deal?” Jongdae snickered like Chanyeol's rage was exciting, “He leaves our territory, gives up your… _whore_ , and doesn’t get in trouble with us again?”

“My whore has nothing to do with this!” 

Baekhyun flinched, because it didn’t feel good to be… referred to as such aloud.

Not by Chanyeol at least.

Even if he knew that’s what he was.

They weren’t _partners._ He was simply there for Chanyeol's pleasure.

Something about thinking that didn’t feel right.

“Your job is to make sure people aren’t sticking fingers into our stash! Correct! Do your job and mind your fucking business, all of you have gotten way too -“

“Chanyeol.” Jongin interrupted.

Said man only fixed him with a glare, “Don't you interrupt me-“

“ _Chanyeol_!” Jongin barked again, standing up from his seat to walk around the table, kneeling beside Baekhyun’s chair, “Hey. You’re scared? Come on, come here.” 

Baekhyun went easily, hands shaking as he grabbed Jongin's shoulders, “J-Just lo..loud..”

“Sh. Come with me, Baek.” The man soothed, helping him from the chair, “Sehun, take him to calm down,” He requested.

And just like that, Baekhyun was being led out, feeling like a sobbing child as all eyes were on him. 

Chanyeol didn’t say a word.

~~~~~~

Baekhyun liked to be outside.

He liked to sit outback every once in a while because Chanyeol had such a beautiful yard.

It was all green, not overgrown, flowers were lined up from the back patio all the way to a gazebo and pool.

But, right now he was probably seeming like a complete _creep_.

Because he’d been sitting here for at least an hour, sitting on a wooden bench halfway between the gazebo and the back patio.

Then, ten minutes ago Chanyeol had walked to the gazebo from a different back door, one he assumed was connected to Chanyeol's library because Baekhyun only knew of one backdoor and knew the man's library had a sliding glass door. 

Chanyeol had very beautiful tattoos. Various colors, various animals, designs.

Baekhyun hadn’t ever seen someone’s skin so colorful and gorgeous.

The man's skin was a tanned color, muscles tight and Baekhyun could see them flex even though he was a ways away.

He’d watched Chanyeol climb into the hot tub, shrug off his towel and sit with his back toward where Baekhyun was sitting.

He’d watched Chanyeol run wet hands through his hair, pushing it off his face and drape arms across the back of the built in hot tub.

 _Handsome_.

“Come over, baby. Can feel you out here!” 

_And observant._

Baekhyun chewed his lip, taking small steps through the path until his socked foot hit the wood of the gazebo, quietly climbing up until he could stand beside the hot tub.

Chanyeol wasn’t looking at him, but instead leaning his head back with eyes closed and sinking more into the water. 

Even his neck was beautiful and Baekhyun suddenly felt extremely self conscious in his pajamas and robe still from this morning.

“Been looking for you, went by your room, weren’t there. Went by the study, still didn’t find you. Why have you been running around, honeybee?”

“I…”

Chanyeol’s eyes popped open at the nervous tone, licking his lips before settling on putting a hand out towards Baekhyun’s foot, brushing his fingers over the bottom of the robe, “You can tell me.” 

Baekhyun pressed his lips together before sitting down on the wood, watching the bubbles of the hot tub, “... you.. said I was a whore.”

He heard a sigh before a gentle tug in his robe, a hand moving to his sock covered foot, “Get in with me?”

He was a little upset at the change of subjects, but nodded, shrugging his robe off before it occurred to him.. he wasn’t wearing swim trunks and would have to strip off his clothes.

Chanyeol looked like he read the panic on his face though and sat up, moving to be closer on his knees in the water, wet hand grabbing Baekhyun’s ankle and tugging off his sock, “Don't worry. It’s just me, beautiful.”

 _Just you_ was the reason my heart is racing, he wanted to say.

But knew he could never find the words to, and instead reached for his top, finding it difficult to find the strength to remove it in the cold, but did.

He placed it to the side with his socks when Chanyeol pulled at his pajama bottoms.

Baekhyun gulped and quickly rid himself of them, moving to jump in the water because he didn’t want to expose himself too much, plus the cold gave him chills.

“Cute..” He heard Chanyeol drawl and laughed shyly at his light purple cotton underwear.

He supposed Chanyeol probably knew all the underwear he wore anyways because the man had bought them after all, but it still made him blush.

Even more so when Chanyeol was pulling him to sit with him, having him sit on the bottom of the hot tub and facing him.

He could feel the elders legs around his back as he caged him between his legs, large palms running over his chest and warming him back up.

Baekhyun nervously licked his mouth as Chanyeol placed warm water on his body, hands sitting in his lap because the only other places to put them already housed Chanyeol's body.

“Gorgeous…” The man drawled after several minutes, “Do you _feel_ like a whore?” 

Hands were in his waist beneath the water now and he gasped as he was pulled closer, hands moving to rest on Chanyeol's chest so he wouldn’t face plant.

“Do you, _baby_?”

He didn’t.

“No.” 

Chanyeol hummed, but the small grin on his face gave way his emotions, cupping Baekhyun’s jaw and pressing their foreheads together.

The younger instantly tried to look away from his eyes, looking downward until Chanyeol lifted his head more, looking through Baekhyun’s hair, “You’re not. You’re just mine.”

“A whore?”

“No,” Chanyeol's face scrunched up like he was mad, but the kiss he placed onto Baekhyun’s lips was soft, “Do you think you’re a prisoner?” He asked softly, running his fingers over the corner of Baekhyun’s eye, “If you… wanted to leave. You can. We’d only ask that you give us the address so we can make sure it’s safe. So we can send you money. So we can check on you. You’re _my_ responsibility now, nothing that happens is.. because I want to use you. Do you understand?”

“But…” Baekhyun’s face pulled together in confusion, “you said..”

“I know what I said,” Chanyeol rushed out, “And I lied. You don’t have to do anything, okay? You don’t have to even be here if you don’t want to. I’ll get you a home. You can leave.”

Baekhyun’s eyes teared up.

“You don’t have to kiss me, touch me. You can… stay innocent, baby. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to, but.. I want _you_ , and I want to kiss you. Do you want that too?” 

He nodded quickly, fingers finding purchase on Chanyeol's neck.

Baekhyun surged forward too fast, bumping his nose to Chanyeol and flushing pink, flickering his eyes to the elders nervously, licking his bottom lip.

“It’s okay,” Chanyeol whispered, hand curling around Baekhyun’s hip, “Still want you, just relax.” 

Then he leaned forward slowly, finger brushing the corner of Baekhyun’s eye and making them flutter shut, pressing his lips to the youngers.

His heart always raced when Chanyeol kissed him, but not fearfully, just with nerves. 

Especially now, when the man pressed his thumb to the corner of his mouth and he felt his tongue brush against his lips.

Baekhyun promptly gasped, breath catching and curling his hand into Chanyeol's hair, sighing as he felt the man invade his mouth, thumb pressing into his mouth so much so that he could feel it resting against his canine.

Not uncomfortably, but enough for Baekhyun to keep his lips parted, enough for Chanyeol to lick the roof of his mouth and suck on his lips until releasing them with soft, slick noises.

He wondered if this was what people said was _making out_ if this was what they felt when doing such a thing too, because he could feel heat gathering beneath the water, much hotter than the temperature of the hot tub.

“Taste good, baby,” Chanyeol's other hand curled around his back, pulling him against him and Baekhyun gasped as he felt the man's hardness against his thigh, sure his face was a raging red color.

Baekhyun licked his lips, swallowing hard as Chanyeol sat back, seemingly completely unbothered by his hardness, releasing him and spreading his arms along the side of the hot tub.

Something about it.. bothered him. He wasn’t sure if it was irritation he felt.. or need.

Either way he frowned as Chanyeol closed his eyes.

Maybe it was neglect because he felt heated and Chanyeol wasn’t even looking at him anymore even though Baekhyun was _right here_ and sitting on one of his hard thighs. 

Baekhyun crawled fingers up Chanyeol's chest, eyes looking over such muscular skin while he had the chance, but the man didn’t respond.

He pouted because this would be the one time he felt _unafraid_ but the man was in his own world.

So, he climbed more into his lap, sucking in a breath as he pressed his chest to the mans.

Chanyeol smiled when he opened his eyes and Baekhyun laughed under his breath, grinning nervously as he leaned into the others face.

“You flirting with me?” 

Baekhyun giggled, hair getting tossed by Chanyeol's wet fingers when it was brushed back.

“You can flirt with me anytime if I get to see this pretty face,” Chanyeol added with a smirk.

With a deep breath Baekhyun leaned close to press his lips on Chanyeol's, nothing but pressing them together before nervously swiping his tongue to the corner of the elders mouth.

Chanyeol didn’t respond right away, but when Baekhyun sat back he was met with a hand on his hair and urging him back.

“You want to kiss some more?”

“Yes..”

“God you’re adorable.”


	5. If we got each other and that's all we have, I will be your lover and I'll hold your hand

“Heard you and Chanyeol were getting along well.”

Baekhyun blushed red as he looked up into the doorway of the library, “Who… said that?”

“Please. He kissed you at breakfast in front of _everyone_. No need to turn all red and flustered,” Minseok laughed.

He wasn’t exactly red and flustered by choice, he wanted to say.

But, he didn’t have a response at all, scraping his nail on the corner of his book.

“Plus, nobody is allowed in this room. Literally nobody, but the door was open so I should be surprised to see you in here, but I’m really not.” 

Baekhyun gasped at that, frowning the smallest bit, “He.. he said it was okay.” 

Minseok raised a brow at him, humming, “It was his father's library, that’s why it’s off limits. Just wanted to let you know.” 

Baekhyun watched him walk out and chewed on his lip, feeling slightly confused at what that was supposed to mean.

Why would Chanyeol give him permission to be in here and not anyone else? 

Chanyeol seemed to really love his dad, that much was obvious, so why wasn’t he afraid Baekhyun would do something bad?

He could, if he wanted.

He could steal the golden decorations, the old collectors books, the centuries old style lantern in the corner.

Baekhyun could, if he so wanted.

He chewed on his lip as he turned to look in his lap.

He’d only ever stolen money from his father before.

Baekhyun wasn’t a thief.

_Was he?_

He _had_ stolen thousands of dollars.

God he must be a thief because he did have some of Chanyeol's books in his room too.

Now his eyes were watering as he jumped up to run down the hall.

“Hey, Baek-“

Baekhyun ran right past Kyungsoo, he could apologize to the man later but his heart was racing and if he didn’t get things off his chest then he’d drop to the floor and hyperventilate.

By the time he burst into his own room he was in tears, shaking and breathing hard as he scattered to grab the books from around the room.

He _didn’t know_ they were important. He didn’t know they were Chanyeol's fathers.

Baekhyun’s entire face was red and streaked with tears as he held the books on his arm.

He could go take them to the library, could go put them back and act like he never took them.

But that would be lying.

And… he didn’t think Chanyeol liked to lie.

So, he found himself outside Chanyeol's door, directly across from his own, pressing his ear to the surface.

He couldn’t hear anything and gave a sigh of relief because maybe he could get away with writing a note of apology.

Baekhyun pushed the door open and that thought went through the window because even though the room was dimly lit he could see Chanyeol's bare back peeking from the covers.

The floorboards creaked and suddenly the man spun around and Baekhyun dropped to his knees, books going scattering across the floor because it wasn’t just _anything_ Chanyeol had pointed at him.

Where the fuck a gun even came from Baekhyun had no idea, under his pillow? Beside his bed? On the frame? 

All he knew was someone just pointed a gun at him, and he was going to pass out.

It was the only reasonable choice because his chest was on fire and his breath was _heavy_.

“Fuck. Baby, no no. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, baby. Baekhyun, hey. I’m sorry - fuck.”

“ ‘m s-sorry!” Baekhyun squealed, forehead pressed into the floor and sobbing, “s-so-rry!”

“God. Baby, no. No, no. It’s gone. Y-You just startled me, I’m sorry. I’m going to pick you up.”

Baekhyun screeched when Chanyeol was picking him up, flailing before quickly digging his arms into the man's shoulders. 

“Listen to my breathing, my love. Just listen, honeybee. Good boy, just relax.” Chanyeol crooned, scratching Baekhyun’s hair and pacing the room with the much smaller man wrapped around his front.

It was easy to just hold Baekhyun like this, because he was incredibly small. (Or Chanyeol was just incredibly big.)

“That’s my baby, breathe. You’re doing so well, I know it hurts. I know. Used to have them too, it’s okay. I-I’m so sorry I scared you.” 

Baekhyun was only half paying attention to his rambling, sucking in breaths over Chanyeol's shoulder, but his forehead did scrunch up at that, nostrils flaring as he pressed his face into the man's skin and tried to get his lungs to stop expanding painfully against his ribs.

“You’re getting much better, gorgeous. You’re doing _so_ much better. You’re calming down so fast now, so proud of you, baby.” 

Baekhyun didn’t feel like he was doing anything to be proud of, but it felt really good to be told so.

Chanyeol sat down on his bed once Baekhyun seemed somewhat calm, fingers brushing away hair from behind his ear and leaning back against his headboard, “That’s it, little one, so good. So good.”

All the praise had something lighting up in Baekhyun’s chest, it always _had_ , but the way Chanyeol cooed at him, treated him like a baby - but _not_ at all.

It was addicting.

He sat back with a hiccup like noise, hand moving to press against Chanyeol's chest.

The other was leaning over to kiss his cheek instantly, hands moving to brush the tears from his face and kiss his skin.

Baekhyun felt gross with drying tears on his skin and his painfully raw eyes, but Chanyeol didn’t look at him like he was gross at all, continuing to pepper kisses against his face.

He supposed the man wasn’t kissing his mouth in fear Baekhyun couldn’t breathe, but his panic was more of a simmer now, and he’d very much prefer Chanyeol's mouth on his trembling lips because he didn’t know if the elder would be upset about him accidentally taking the books.

His stomach turned at the thought of Chanyeol being upset with him at all.

Baekhyun hadn’t ever _felt_ the need to actively talk to people, much less to _impress_ , so he knew he shouldn’t.. but he had to have at least a crush on the man.

Pathetic, he internally scolded, because Chanyeol was _dangerous_.

He’d just pointed a fucking gun at him for fucksake and caused him to have a fully fledged panic attack.

 _Fuck,_ Baekhyun was screwed.

“Why’d you have books? I was scared you hit yourself with them,” He felt Chanyeol's lips press to his ear, “But you didn’t and I’m relieved. Not a scratch on you, tiny.”

Baekhyun gulped, pressing his hands between his thighs and startling himself when his finger brushed between Chanyeol's legs because he was situated between his thighs, and the man was _only_ in tight black underwear.

But, Chanyeol stared right at his face, unbothered by the sudden touch, fingers continuing to comb his hair, expression fond and somewhat pained.

“Hm? You still scared? I’d never hurt you, baby, you just.. can’t sneak up on me, okay? Just tell me it’s you as you come in, honeybee. You’re allowed wherever you want, but when you come in here just say your name. I can hear that sweet voice even when it’s soft. Don’t want to scare you.” 

“Why… why’d you… have it?” Baekhyun stuttered, looking down at his fingers that he made sure to keep _away_ from Chanyeol's lap. 

But he hoped Chanyeol didn’t mind he was sneaking a few glances down his chest anyways. 

Chanyeol sighed, hands firmly grasping Baekhyun’s hips and carefully pushing the edge of his shirt up just enough to lay his fingers on his skin, “I’m a.. man that has many enemies. Being in charge of drug export and sales isn’t really… something easy, beautiful. It.. calls for a lot of precaution, it’s dangerous - but don’t ever think I’d let anything happen to you, never. Never would let someone innocent be put in danger.” 

“You… you haven’t gone out in a-a while.. because me?” 

“No. No. My job doesn’t handle physical stuff. In fact, no drugs are allowed inside my home for safety. Wouldn’t want someone to overdose or.. accidentally take something, no drugs allowed but I don’t think I need to tell you that, right?”

Baekhyun shook his head quickly, eyes wide and shooting up to look at Chanyeol, “I.. I never..”

“I used to.” 

Again, he felt shock run through him.

“Not anymore. Of course not. Used to take… some pills when I was a teenager. Made me erratic, aggressive. Went to rehabilitation for years.. it’s.. difficult sometimes, being around them, but that’s why I don’t.. don't go to warehouses much - don’t, please don’t look at me like that, baby. I’d n-never, _never_ , want you to see that,” Chanyeol stared at him painfully, and if Baekhyun didn’t know any better he looked ashamed, _scared._

Of who? He wondered.

Surely not Baekhyun who had a panic attack when someone looked at him too long and he thought it looked mean.

“I-th-thought I.. I don’t steal your books!” He cried, “D-Didn’t know! That’s.. why I’m here! B-But the.. gun-“

Chanyeol burst into chuckles, cupping behind his ear and sweetly running his thumb over his cheek, “Baekhyun. I don’t think you could steal anything, much less my things, don’t think you _would_. Breathe, pretty baby. Everything I have is yours, it’s not stealing.” He paused before his eyes widened the smallest bit, “I-I mean I share with everyone, yeah. We all share.”

Baekhyun has felt something similar to.. hope, maybe.

Until Chanyeol switched up his words, but that also didn’t make sense because Minseok said he hadn’t been allowed in the library, but Baekhyun was.

Baekhyun found his fingers clenching a tiny bit and he wondered if.. if Chanyeol was doing these same things for other people, if he was holding others, kissing them.

Telling them nice things.

He felt like he wanted to cry again at the thought, but instead was leaning over to press a peck to Chanyeol's mouth and hoping the man got _something_ out of it whether it be an apology.

Or a confession.

Chanyeol made a surprised noise against his lips, but was responding instantly, parting his lips with his tongue and kissing him harder, wetly.

He felt calmer when he knew that at least right now Chanyeol was holding just him.

Baekhyun pulled away when his lips were swollen, looking through his hair and wrapping his forearm around the back of Chanyeol's neck, pressing his head down on the man's throat as he caught his breath. 

It was unfair Chanyeol was so sweet to him because he couldn’t help himself from feeling _good_ when the man pulled him closer, tucking him under his chin and petting his back.

Like he was something special.

“Stole.. money.. in my bag,” Baekhyun confessed, fingers tracing a pattern of stars on Chanyeol's shoulder.

“Don’t care,” He could feel Chanyeol's voice rumble against his cheek and curled his toes up, “You can have that back. It’s yours. I just know you wouldn’t steal a thing from me, Baekhyun. I _know_ it. Couldn't give a fuck what you stole from your.. father, he was a terrible fucking person. He must have hurt you really badly, maybe not physically, but he _did_ . Yixing told me nobody had that bad of panic and anxiety attacks for no reason baby, I’ve had panic atracks before and they _fucking_ hurt. And it hurts me to see you having them so much, even if the medicine works. 

Much prefer it if you don’t have to go through that _at all_ . I just.. why would someone hurt you? I want to know. I want you to be able to hold a conversation with me and not be scared. To tell me what happened to you, why you were running those streets with a bag of cash and clothes. You don’t even have an ID, Baekhyun. You’re nearly twenty and don’t have anything except for the birth certificate in that bag - I’m sorry, but I went through it. I just.. I worry about you. I’ve been.. it sounds so creepy, but we were trailing you ever since we found Byun on our territory. I just couldn’t help.. I feel like I know you so _well_ but not enough at the same fucking time. It’s so.. I don’t know. It pisses me off that someone mistreated you.” 

Baekhyun furrowed his brows because Chanyeol sounded really mad, but his hands were combing down his back and thigh softly, despite the almost growl like tone he was using and the heavy breathing ruffling his hair. 

He licked his mouth and clutched onto the man tighter, releasing a quiet scared noise when Chanyeol moved, having thought the man was leaving, but he only shifted them to lay down, murmuring a _sh, it’s okay, baby_.

He felt more comfortable laying down across Chanyeol's chest like a blanket - even more so when an actual blanket was being pulled over his back.

_Wasn’t this too intimate?_

Baekhyun hadn’t even been in Chanyeol's room before, hadn’t had a chance to look around because he was afraid the man was going to get rid of him for stealing the books.

He shouldn’t have just come into his room. But now he just felt much better than before, palms resting under his cheek directly over Chanyeol's stomach.

He was really warm.

“How.. when did.. my dad come into y-your area? Since…”

_Since when have you been watching me?_

Chanyeol cleared his throat and Baekhyun peeked up to look at him and found the man actually looking somewhat nervous, he’d never really _seen_ him look that way before.

But he did. Chanyeol was just staring at the ceiling, one hand brushing Baekhyun’s hair absentmindedly and the other arm draped over his forehead.

“It’s not scary, okay? I was just.. we were looking out for you. Didn’t even know he had a kid until we were observing.” He said defensively without even looking down at Baekhyun.

Baekhyun nodded against his palm, shyly but quickly splaying a hand down across Chanyeol's chest in what he hoped was comforting.

The man seemed to like the move though because he moved the arm off his head to press Baekhyun’s fingers to his lips, holding his palm just under his chin after a few kisses to his hand.

Baekhyun blushed, but didn’t think Chanyeol noticed a thing.

“Two years ago, he was spotted snooping around our warehouse crates on a dock, back then my dad was still in charge. I was still training, so he assigned me, Sehun, Minseok to all look after you. Probably why.. Sehun follows you around a bit, he’s just used to it.”

Baekhyun _hadn’t_ noticed the man did, but now that it was pointed out… he always did seem to be around just when he got lost in the mansion or needed help. 

“... you were so cute. God. And then when I went to get Jongin, what a coincidence. I really hadn’t known. You’re so much prettier up close. Used to just.. just sit across the street at a cafe hours, you spent _so_ long at the library. So long just… walking aimlessly. Do you know how dangerous that is, honeybee? Fuck. Nearly gave me a _heart attack_ . So late. It would be so dark and you were _so_ young, Baekhyun. You can’t be going out in the dark like that, we had to.. take out many people that started trailing you.

You were a teenager, and you were naive.. walking into alleys and not even looking where you were going. Your area of town was _so_ sketchy, baby. So dangerous and just.. after a while… of just.. watching you playing on the library computers.. smiling, you looked really happy until they began to close and had to.. tell you to leave, I wanted to force them to let it stay open. To keep it open until you were done. 

.. I must sound like a stalker, I’m not sorry though. Feel like.. I know you, like.. _really_ know you. You like to play computer games and read until your eyes burn, fucking _hours._ Used to wonder why someone would spend weekends at a library, why they’d walk miles for _fun_. Never saw you really eat anything, but saw the librarian talking to you sometimes. She gave you chips and water every once in a while, I thought it was really sweet of her.

I.. nevermind-“

“I want to hear.” Baekhyun blurted, voice shaking but for an entire different reason than fear. Hope? Desperation? Fondness _?_ Need? 

Chanyeol sounded so.. fond, entirely enamored in a way Baekhyun had never in his life heard, much less about _him._

The elders voice was deep and soothing, scolding sometimes, but most of all he just sounded so happy, like he was reminiscing rather than telling a story, nervous but so _truthful._

Baekhyun curled his knees up against Chanyeol's inner leg when he turned on his side, arms cuddling the blanket under his chin and hoping the man was comfortable enough to let him stay comfortable between his legs.

Because he didn’t want to leave when he felt so safe. 

“Gave her food sometimes, to give you.” Chanyeol whispered, “.. Figured you must not have a lot of money - I was right - but it didn’t mean I couldn’t see your knees shake when you walked around. And you _continued_ to do so. You just.. kept going, and I know it’s because you didn’t _want_ to go home, but you always eventually did. Sometimes I just wanted to make sure that.. I saw you eat before I left. That I saw you make it to your house before leaving.”

“Can I.. can I sleep h-here?” Baekhyun’s body shook, but his tears were falling silently.

“Always, Baekhyun.” 

******

After that, things were only a little different.

Baekhyun wasn’t sure if Chanyeol knew what he was doing, if he was _aware_ of his feelings.

But he’d taken up the man's time anyways - stealing all of the attention he could get.

Chanyeol didn’t seem to notice though, and if he did, he didn’t say anything, usually just reaching out for him, pressing lips to his cheek. 

_Good morning, baby._

_Come here my little puppy._

_How do you look so beautiful?_

He’d blush, but always go climbing into Chanyeol's lap anyways, with much more excitement than needed, obvious excitement even if he didn’t really say much at all.

Chanyeol showered him in things. Made it a point to leave clothes, bags, _makeup_ on his bed.

A brand new laptop, a brand new gaming system, a _gold_ credit card.

Baekhyun bawled every single time, sobbing like a baby and interrupting Chanyeol _wherever_ he was.

And if he wasn’t home, then Baekhyun called, and he called and cried and Chanyeol sounded so worried and cooed at him until he could breathe.

It meant a lot because Baekhyun never felt he could breathe normally before Chanyeol took him in - or, kidnapped him… in a way.

 _Technically_ Chanyeol literally owned him, he had bought him in a sick way by riding off his father's debt. But it didn’t feel that way anymore. Not how it had in the beginning, not really at all.

Chanyeol had been so rude to him in that alley that Baekhyun had been _so_ afraid. He’d just watched him choke for air, smash his head into bricks and _yelled_ at him.

Baekhyun thought for sure he’d be a slave, a _pet,_ as Chanyeol had originally said - along with a _whore._

But they didn’t _do_ anything, Chanyeol didn’t even come find him first these days, or initiate kisses on the lips.

It was Baekhyun.

It was Baekhyun that ran into the middle of his meetings and climbed into his lap, turning to hide his face into Chanyeol's shirt when the others cooed at him. 

Chanyeol didn't even seem to mind then, not even when Baekhyun interrupted very important and aggressive sounding phone calls filled with threats and Chanyeol's menacing scowl.

He’d only mute the phone and pull Baekhyun into his lap, _Just give me a minute and I’ll kiss all over that cute face, honeybee._

And he did, he’d spit curses and press a hand over Baekhyun’s ear as if he could block the aggression, despite the fact that Baekhyun indeed had _two_ ears and liked the way Chanyeol's voice sounded when he rested on his chest.

It didn’t matter what he was saying, because he felt warm and most of all _safe._

Chanyeol hadn’t exactly confessed a thing. He hadn’t admitted to anything more than.. stalking him, but Baekhyun felt it was something at least; even if it wasn’t a confession of feelings, it was a confession that he _cared_ about him. That he protected him for two years.

He didn’t understand - couldn’t understand - why Chanyeol had bothered, let alone why he found him _interesting_ when it was exactly how he said and when Baekhyun was out of class he’d just wander, and if he wasn’t at work during summer then he was at the library with a rumbling stomach.

They had free computers and books though, so Baekhyun liked it. 

He must have looked so ratty compared to now, compared to how Chanyeol had taken him.

Cheap, plain t-shirts that came in packs of three, ripped jeans that had originally _not_ been ripped. Sometimes big plaid overlays he’d snatch from his father if he wasn’t home.

Baekhyun hadn’t been pretty at all.

But, he felt he was now.

He felt he was pretty in the luxury cotton and silk that was in his closet. The patterned tops and choice in pants.. an embarrassing amount of underwear to choose from.

Most of all, Baekhyun felt like he didn’t stick out like a sore thumb as he had in school, even when he was walking on the streets.

He hadn’t gotten bullied for it per say, but it didn’t mean that he didn’t _notice_ when others looked at him weirdly. When he wasn’t wearing the gym uniform in class while everyone else was.

People just… avoided him.

And he appreciated that now because he was certain he’d have had an anxiety attack at the attention as he had sophomore year in class, passing out right in the spot.

At least he had passed out, because he hadn’t known if anyone laughed at him for it. His teacher the next day said it was due to low blood sugar though, and Baekhyun appreciated that too, because he was certain people _would_ have bullied him for being such a socially anxious person. 

“What do you feel about going out for a while?” 

Baekhyun’s eyes shot up from the book in his lap to look at Chanyeol confused, “Like… out? Of the gates?” 

Chanyeol chuckled, but it wasn’t mocking, it was fond, laying his feet up on his desk and looking away from Baekhyun across the room only to pour himself a drink. “Would you like that? To go outside the gate, with just me?” 

“I… I don’t know. No, I couldn’t poss-Yes. I-I want to, yeah.” 

Baekhyun brushed his hair from his face to try and make up for his awkwardness, trying to tame his hair nicely because he was hoping Chanyeol was implying more than just to hangout outside the gates.

Chanyeol looked at him for a bit without response, he usually tended to, but it wasn’t scary how Baekhyun had originally thought. He was only thinking, and liked to look at him as he did so.

It still made Baekhyun flustered though. 

“Good.” A wide grin spread across Chanyeol's lips, tapping his nail on his chair, “You want to come see me?” 

Baekhyun always did and was giggling under his breath, face alight as he jumped up at an embarrassing speed, book falling to the floor and he scattered to set it nicely on the couch when he heard Chanyeol's booming laughter.

“Tiny, you’re just adorable.” He called.

“Not.. not purposely,” Baekhyun flustered, bouncing over to stand by the desk chair, fingers curling over the leather and leaning over the side.

He already knew he looked too excited, he’d already _blown_ his cover and his stomach was swirling in excitement at Chanyeol's _outing_ suggestion.

A _date,_ Baekhyun hoped.

“Always are though,” Chanyeol dropped his feet to the ground and opened his arms, not even having to say anything for Baekhyun to already be climbing into his lap with a breathy sigh. “My baby. Always _fucking_ amazing.” He cooed, lingering fingers on Baekhyun’s pulse.

Baekhyun beamed, more of a nervous look in his eyes before puckering his lips.

Chanyeol _never_ told him no to kisses, ever, and Baekhyun felt all the more entitled to them when the man gave them instantly, perhaps more eagerly than Baekhyun had offered.

No. Completely more eager and enthusiastically because Chanyeol had recently got in the habit of nipping his lips, biting them red and puffy, usually apologizing with softer kisses if he claimed they looked sore.

They _weren't, if_ anything the kisses only sent a burning sensation down Baekhyun's stomach.

He wasn’t afraid of giving himself to Chanyeol. There’s nobody else he could ever imagine taking his virginity.

But, the issue was he wasn’t sure it’d be a smart choice. 

Because then he couldn’t handle thinking Chanyeol could be with another person, and they weren’t _partners_. Chanyeol never said they were and Baekhyun never said they were when he was being hounded by the others either.

Because he didn’t know more than that Chanyeol cared about him and that he liked to kiss him.

He liked to cuddle under blankets and ask Baekhyun to talk to him, said he liked his voice even if he stuttered and was quiet.

Let Baekhyun snuggle up whenever or wherever he wanted and praised him for _anything._ Never questioned him too much, if any at all, never really asked for more than occasional kisses, never pushed under Baekhyun’s clothes more than soft fingertips on his spine even if he was hard and the smaller could feel it pressing into his bottom.

Baekhyun wanted Chanyeol, but he didn’t want the man to _simply_ want him too. 

He wanted more than the man to just kiss him or fuck him, to show him sex.

Maybe that would break Baekhyun’s heart. 

So he wouldn’t bring it up.

_Not yet._


	6. I'm just gonna swim until you love me, hoping that your heart will rescue me

“Hey, Chanyeol?” 

Baekhyun felt more than heard his acknowledging groan against his neck, felt a few lingering and tired kisses pressing to his shoulder where the man was curled around him.

“Baby.” He acknowledged, voice rough and tired from just waking up.

It sent a small shiver down Baekhyun’s spine, licking his lips when Chanyeol worked a leg between his and pressed into his back more.

They’d slept in the same bed only a few times.

Usually it was an accident on Baekhyun’s part, but sometimes it was simply because Chanyeol _asked_ him too.

But, each time he’d never get used to the hardness pressing into his back every morning, the warmth against his spine even if Chanyeol was near nude.

He’d been so embarrassed when last night he’d walked into the room intending on sneaking into his bed because he always seemed to be able to sleep better and longer with Chanyeol near, but the man had been fresh out of the shower.

It was unfair how quickly Baekhyun was flustered by his appearance and the towel around his waist, turning face down in the mattress with a squeal.

Chanyeol had laughed about it for a good _hour._

Baekhyun liked the sound of him laughing anyways, even if it was at him.

“You asked a few weeks ago.. why I was outside so late.. months ago.” 

That seemed to catch Chanyeol off guard, because he was sitting back instantly and pulling Baekhyun to turn around and face him with a splayed hand on his waist. “Yeah?” 

Baekhyun smiled tiredly, but also nervously as he sat up, pushing his chest to Chanyeol's and resting his knees lazily around his hips. “Can… I-I don’t want to panic… want to hear..” He pointed slightly towards Chanyeol's chest and the man beamed like they hadn’t just woken up.

“Lay down, whatever helps, my love.” He cooed, resting his palm around Baekhyun’s jaw and shifting them just a small bit so he could sit up against the pillows while Baekhyun pressed his ear to his chest. 

Baekhyun sighed a relieved noise when he laid his cheek down, fingers following a tattoo on Chanyeol's ribs.

“Was… my- my dad..”

“No, no.” Chanyeol interrupted softly, lips pressing to his hair, “We aren’t starting off like that. Take a big breath, deep breath and count to ten. Then, you start and I want you to sound confident and calm, because you _should be._ You’re safe with me. You’re safe, right here, laying in my arms, honeybee.” 

Baekhyun’s eyes fluttered shut as he took a drop breath.

_You’re safe with me._

_You’re safe._

_You’re safe with Chanyeol._

“I’ll take care of you. You’re my responsibility.” 

_Safe and calm,_ he repeated to himself.

“Just breathe, Baekhyun. My pretty baby, take a breath, tiny.”

It wasn’t exactly what Baekhyun secretly wanted to hear from Chanyeol, it wasn’t really the confession he hoped the man would give.

But it calmed him down all the same.

“You feel better?” Chanyeol combed down his hair before gently pulling Baekhyun’s chin up to look at him, “Beautiful, baby.” 

“Yeah.” Baekhyun whispered, swallowing hard and squeezing Chanyeol's waist.

“Good,” The man cooed, “I’m listening to every word that falls from those pretty lips.” 

The younger giggled, debating on if it was worth it to sit up and kiss Chanyeol a few times, and it _was_ , but he realized if he didn’t go through with things now then he didn’t know if he would.

“My dad… had friends.” He swallowed, shutting his eyes and smiling probably too dreamy for Chanyeol _not_ to know how he felt about him because the man was running fingers all over his face instantly.

Across his forehead, down the bridge of his nose, running along his cheek only to press his thumb against the side of Baekhyun’s lip for a moment. 

Baekhyun felt _calm._

“... used to.. get high, smoke up the house. Used to eat all the food that I.. I had just picked up.” He sighed, turning his head so the tips of Chanyeol's fingers brushed over his Cupid’s bow, “.. said I was pretty. Said.. _come to uncle_. We..”

Chanyeol stiffened up like a fucking pole beneath him, so much so that Baekhyun’s eyes popped open, but the man didn’t say anything only looked down at him with a clenched jaw and waiting for him to continue.

“.. dad said to _be nice Baekhyun_. So.. I-I was nice. I sat in their laps and they.. they stunk like dirt an-and alcohol. Like.. must and.. sweat, and.. I just.. sat.”

“How old were you?”

Even Chanyeol's voice sounded stiff, deep and demanding and Baekhyun was beginning to get worried, scooting up to rest against his collarbone, “Thirteen.. I didn’t.. what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, baby. Continue.” Chanyeol brushed off with a peck to his nose, neck strained but he pressed a second to Baekhyun’s forehead too.

“..Kay,” Baekhyun whispered, eyes darting to watch Chanyeol's hand that was resting on the blankets in front of him. “So creepy. They were so.. gross. I didn’t.. I was scared, my dad.. I-I heard them talk. Said I don’t listen.. that they could _teach me._ My dad said.. _not yet,_ but ever since then I’ve been.. so, so _s-scared._ I just.. I just know that if.. you didn’t t-“

“That’s why you said,” Chanyeol said gruffly, “Don't rape me.”

Baekhyun gave a nod, reaching both hands out to grab Chanyeol's and bring it to his lips for a tiny kiss, hands shaking but the older mans were clenched, only unraveling when Baekhyun forced them to so he could play with them in order to keep his breathing calm.

A kiss to his finger, thumb, palm, tracing the stem of a thorny rose that was tattooed around his ring finger almost _like_ a ring. Anything for a distraction, to keep himself breathing.

“Baby.” Chanyeol let him do so for a good few minutes without speaking at all, without making anything worse than it needed to be, but deemed the timing okay when Baekhyun was simply pressing fingers to his and measuring them up. “Let me talk to you. A big secret.” 

Baekhyun’s brows pulled together as he was forced into a sitting position when Chanyeol sat up beneath him, nodding frantically and pulling the blankets around his shoulders as he sat criss crossed on the bed.

“Don't think I’m getting mad at you, not for even a second,” Chanyeol requested, leaning over to firmly press a kiss to Baekhyun’s forehead, petting the back of his hair, “Never. I’m not mad at you.” 

“Okay.. Chan.. you.. you okay?”

Chanyeol smiled, but it looked off and Baekhyun was very good at deciphering his expressions now because he spent _a lot_ of time looking at him.

He was just _too_ handsome. 

“If I see you, and you tell me you’re okay, then I’m okay.” 

“I-I’m okay,” Baekhyun stuttered, heart itching to curl back up at his chest, but knew this must be a serious deal if Chanyeol was adamant they sit apart for it, even if it was only an inch distance between Baekhyun’s knee and Chanyeol's thigh.

“Okay.” He’d never seen Chanyeol take such a big, readying breath before, but he did. “Baekhyun, they never touched you, right? I’m not saying they should have made you uncomfortable for years, I’m just.. you were never touched?” 

“Never, please.. C-Chanyeol..” Baekhyun felt his heart race just because Chanyeol looked and sounded distraught, reaching his hand out for the mans, “Please?”

He knew the man purposely wanted them separate, but he also knew Chanyeol _always_ was adamant about watching Baekhyun’s breathing carefully, making sure he’s not panicking. 

So, he gave his palm over quickly and Baekhyun started tracing the lines in his palm and _felt_ Chanyeol relax.

“That’s good, baby. God. I’m so relieved, so relieved. I’m going to tell you something you _cannot_ tell anyone, okay? Not Kyungsoo, Jongdae, _definitely_ not Jongin. Secrets just between us.”

“Special secrets?” 

Chanyeol sighed, lip twitching upwards as he couldn’t help eyeing the brunette tracing his fingers who wasn’t even looking at him but causing his entire body want to sweep him up, “Yes, Baekhyun. A special secret, just for you to know because I lo- because you’re my baby.”

Baekhyun peeked up with a shy grin, chocolate eyes quickly shooting back down and Chanyeol was _so_ fond it was ridiculous.

“Okay?” He leaned over to kiss the youngers hair, burying his nose to chase the strawberry scent before sitting back.

“ ‘Kay.” 

“You remember.. what I told you about Jongin's mother?”

He watched Baekhyun’s face scrunch up in thought and felt like he wasn’t blood thirsty despite moments before _wanting_ to find these fucking creeps Baekhyun had spoke of. “Um.. she.. passed away from drugs.”

“That’s right,” Chanyeol praised, “Listen so well. Yes, she did.” 

Baekhyun looked at him with a boxy grin at the praise, cheeks lightly flushed and squeezing his larger hand between both of his.

 _Adorable_.

But he needed to get this off his chest. 

“She.. I.. she was often high, okay?” Chanyeol lowered his voice, “She was a.. very _bad_ mom, Baekhyun. She was high and wouldn’t take care of Jongin, she’d leave him with nanny’s all the time, or even with me, and I was _barely_ thirteen.”

Baekhyun chewed his lips, looking more confused by the second, but was nodding along anyways because he was cute, sweet, and Chanyeol's chest burned to ruin whatever image the beauty had of him.

But he couldn’t _not_ tell him.

Not when he was so, so.. loyal to him. 

Not when Baekhyun shared a big secret of his own.

“One night she was very high. I mean, she often was, but.. that night was.. v-very bad. I was.. I was a scrawny kid, baby. I..” Chanyeol gulped and removed his hand from Baekhyun to run both of his through his hair, “.. she was an _adult._ I was just a _kid._ She was high and.. you know, aggressive. I-I think she thought I was my _dad_ because we.. we look so much alike but.. I was only.. I was a _child_ and she.. she came to me.. and I-I don't know then-“

The implication was clear.

“Chanyeol!” 

Baekhyun burst like a water fountain, throwing his limbs at the man and sobbing, fingers grabbing all over Chanyeol's shoulder to force into his lap.

“Sh. I’m okay. Okay now, I’m okay.” 

Chanyeol wasn’t even crying, he’d _gone_ through the trauma, he’d been addicted, he’d hated himself, he’d slept around.

He wasn’t _upset_ anymore.

Angry, of course.

But not upset. Not crying.

But Baekhyun was in his place, Baekhyun cried into his skin like it had _been_ him. Likely because Baekhyun’s biggest fear was to be raped.

And Chanyeol _had been._

“I got you. I have you. Baby, you’re okay and I’m okay. You have me.” 

“Ch-Chanyeol,” The smallers whimpered, pressing his tears into Chanyeol's collarbone.

But, Chanyeol's eyes were watering at his crying and he didn’t know if it was for himself or Baekhyun.

All he knew was he was cradling the younger and felt his shoulders had a weight lifted, that even if he hadn’t told someone back then, he’d told someone now. 

And Baekhyun knew it wasn’t right too.

“I-I want to hold y-you!” 

“You’re holding me, hold onto me, Baekhyun. You're comforting me too, sweet baby. Swear. Feel better with you, puppy.” 

Baekhyun cried harder, but he _did_ hold onto Chanyeol tighter.


	7. There’s gotta be a reason that i’m here on earth, gotta be a reason for the dust and the dirt

“Baby.” 

Baekhyun giggled when his arm was yanked back playfully, hip bumping into Chanyeol's. “Chan!” He pouted.

Chanyeol grinned down at him but was quick to swoop down and kiss his lips much too wetly for a kiss in the middle of the sidewalk as people walked back and forth.

Baekhyun had learned the past six months that if there was _anything_ Chanyeol hated it was definitely to keep his hands to himself, no matter the place.

“What do you want to eat?” The man asked, kissing his pink cheek as he pulled away, standing over Baekhyun’s form.

Baekhyun hummed to himself, swinging Chanyeol's fingers back and forth and gasping when his boyfriend pulled him in suddenly and sent a glare at a stranger that walked too close for Chanyeols comfort.

His boyfriend was so handsome, but very scary when he wanted to be.

“Birthday boy, what do you want?” 

“Want kisses..” Baekhyun mumbled under his breath, so quiet he wasn’t even sure Chanyeol _heard_ but the man laughed and swept that thought away.

“I’ll give you _so many_ kisses. Later.” Chanyeol promised, unwrapping their fingers only to throw his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulder, fingers teasing his collarbone.

It made the younger swallow hard and turn bright red.

It _had_ been Baekhyun’s idea, but that didn’t mean he didn’t get insanely flustered.

When Chanyeol approached him a week ago ranting about all these plans for his birthday Baekhyun had been instantly nervous because he hadn’t wanted the man to be offended or anything.

Because renting out a beach house and going to the ocean _did_ sound amazing, especially with all Chanyeol's ranting of the gifts he was sure Baekhyun was going to be obsessed with.

But it wasn’t what Baekhyun had _wanted._

Sure, he could have just requested when they were already there, just the two of them, but he had.. wanted to make sure so he could prepare.

Chanyeol's face had been priceless, he’d looked both flustered and enamored, it was beautiful.

And now, in a foreign town three hours away from home, Baekhyun _had_ still enjoyed all his gifts because even his simple request had been answered with Chanyeol arguing that he, “Couldn’t possibly just give his favorite person _one_ gift.”

Baekhyun just wanted Chanyeol, and that was enough.

But he ended up with their rented beach house full of flowers and gift bags of clothes and jewelry sitting full in the living room.

The beach house itself had been a _fucking_ dream. Baekhyun had sobbed when he saw how pretty it was.

Huge windows, a study with one way glass walls, plants everywhere. 

The floors were pure oak and Baekhyun had never seen a place for two people be so open and homey at the same time. 

Baekhyun really liked _air_. He liked the wind, he liked the clean smell of the ocean.

He just liked to be _calm._

Even now, hand locked with Chanyeol's he felt calmer than he had in his entire life even though they stuck out as tourists horribly. 

Stopping to take pictures, running barefoot in the sand, playing like absolute children even though Chanyeol wore a watch worth more than their rental house, and a button down to the beach. 

Baekhyun wasn’t much better in a light blue silk top valued well over three hundred dollars tucked into dark wash jeans. 

Yeah. They stuck out terribly.

Even then Baekhyun didn’t feel anxious, not when Chanyeol was holding his hand or leaning down so Baekhyun could fix his hair that peeked from under his hat. 

Because Chanyeol was here and he was _with him._

And he was adorable with a SnapBack on his head making his ears poke out more and seeming more like he was dressed by a high schooler than the drug dealer that was known to slick his hair back and _glare._

No. He was all smiles and soft touches, excitement on his face the more things they found to do in this small port town.

 _Adorable_ was the only word Baekhyun would use to describe Chanyeol.

Others would counter with _terrifying._

“I want pictures of you up there!” 

Baekhyun gasped, nearly tripping as Chanyeol tugged him again - excitement of a _child._

“Baby, please? I really want you to stand up there.” Chanyeol requested again, arm looping Baekhyun’s waist and already walking him towards a huge statue of a seal because he _knew_ Baekhyun let him get his way with things when he asked nicely. 

“Up.” He demanded, patting Baekhyun’s spine.

“Chan… think it’s illegal to get on there, says no touching..” Baekhyun mumbled, pointing at a sign.

Chanyeol cackled before swiftly kissing his neck and rolling his eyes playfully, “My _existence_ is illegal. Get up, honeybee.”

Baekhyun burst into giggles at that because it was completely true, moving to climb up the side of the cement block the seal sat on. “You have to take pictures with me too!” He yelled down.

And even with onlookers gawking and pointing at him, Chanyeol was down at the bottom laughing at his pouting with his phone out.

Baekhyun felt calm.

“Okay! Okay! Come down, beautiful!” 

As soon as Chanyeol was close Baekhyun was jumping down into his arms and getting _covered_ in kisses.

~~~~~~

_“Baby.”_

Baekhyun didn’t need any more words, because Chanyeol had _purred_ the nickname, holding the door to their beach house open.

He launched himself at the man, so hard and fast that Chanyeol laughed aloud, ringing through the glass living room, hands going beneath Baekhyun’s thighs to pick him up.

He had thought he’d be more nervous, that he’d be trembling more, shaking, blushing.

Because that’s how he’d been when Chanyeol had seen him naked the first time, that’s how he’d been when the man pressed his lips to parts _never_ seen by anyone else.

That’s how he’d been when he first curled fingers around Chanyeol's length, verbally worrying that it’ll be painful when they had sex eventually and Chanyeol always, despite sweat on his brow and the hand on him, replied sweetly.

_Don’t worry. I’d never hurt you._

_Baekhyun, I’ll always be easy with you._

_Hey, just focus on right now, Kay? We have time._

They did have time. Chanyeol never once pushed him for anything at all the past six months, never once pulled off Baekhyun’s clothes if he hadn’t wanted it.

But the man expressed how much he had _wanted_ Baekhyun. How gorgeous he was.

_Fuck. You taste so good - is this even real life?_

_Baekhyun, you’re a goddamn angel._

_Be louder baby, you sound like you’re singing._

Baekhyun’s back hit the mattress and he gasped into Chanyeol's mouth, tasting the smallest bit of fruit on his boyfriend's lips, fingers instantly reaching for his own clothes.

“Ah, let me. You just sit there and look pretty.” 

Chanyeol gently pushed his hands away, pulling his ankles towards the end of the bed and Baekhyun laughed loudly, nearly a shriek at being yanked around, sitting up on his elbows.

And then Chanyeol was on his knees at the end of the bed, spread between his legs and pulling off his shoes and socks agonizingly slow.

Baekhyun huffed because he already felt warm. Felt his length slowly hardening, eyes scanning the room to try and calm down a small bit or else this night _wouldn’t_ go how he wanted at all.

“Honeybee.” 

He locked eyes with Chanyeol and swore he could have hardened fully at the man's smirk, at his naked chest and hands on the edge of Baekhyun’s jeans. 

“We don’t have to do anything,” Chanyeol said softly, fingers moving to unbutton Baekhyun’s pants, but slowly, “I’m fine just spending time wi-“

“Chanyeol!” Baekhyun pouted, “I-I want you.” 

Chanyeol sighed, but it was fond, leaning over to kiss his hip as he pulled off his jeans, “Want you too, beautiful.” 

Baekhyun’s ears reddened which was completely ridiculous when he’d seen Chanyeol naked a handful of times and Chanyeol had him naked even _more_ than that.

“Hey. Just want you to know I love you.” 

He hadn’t realized his breath picked up when he was nude, hadn’t realized Chanyeol had lost his pants, but the hand cupping his jaw was too soft to _not_ realize.

“I love you,” Baekhyun whispered, hands moving to pull Chanyeol down by his shoulders, pressing their lips together opened and wet, “Safe now.”

Chanyeol smiled, pecking the corner of his lips, “Safe, Baekhyun.” 

His eyes searched Baekhyun’s for another second before rolling off the bed and leaving the younger to watch his back, awkwardly sitting naked and spread on his back, fingers messing together on his chest.

“You have to go easy,” He could hear Chanyeol explain fondly and the sound of him digging in their bags, “Okay? Plenty of time to have sex, but my baby is _impatient,_ and this isn’t my fingers, Baek. It’s gonna hurt a lot more if you don’t give it a little.” 

“I..” Baekhyun swallowed hard when Chanyeol turned around with a hand covered in lube, other hand holding a foil package and the bottle, tossing it on the bed as he moved between his legs again. “I fingered myself earlier… in the shower.” 

Chanyeol's eyes glittered, hands spreading his legs apart and bending them up towards his thighs, “Fuck. Good, baby. Next time… let me see.” 

Baekhyun’s breath came out in shutters because Chanyeol started pressing kisses to his inner thigh, teeth scraping his skin but never pulling it too hard or enough to bruise.

He moved his head to go lower and Baekhyun whined, lifting his hips up a bit, “I- not your mouth! Too much, just.. I-I’ll cum too soon.” 

Chanyeol loved to put his lips over Baekhyun’s hole more than what was probably _normal_ and the man always claimed because he liked his baby being _untouched._

He liked the thought that only one person had ever kissed or loved him there.

Only one person _ever_ would.

Baekhyun didn’t have a problem with that at all.

But Chanyeol was _so experienced._

The first time he’d put a finger inside Baekhyun the younger had cum embarrassingly fast, face bright red and near tears of embarrassment but Chanyeol kissed them away, cooing about how _fucking adorable_ it was. How he was really honored to be the first person Baekhyun was ever with. 

“Okay, you want kisses?”

“Mhm.” 

Chanyeol laughed, middle finger prodding his entrance as he moved to lean over Baekhyun and lick into his mouth. 

His other hand brushed the youngers nipple with his thumb and Baekhyun squeaked, hips jumping up and accidentally pushing back so Chanyeol's fingers went all the way in, causing him to moan louder, flushing and whimpering against the others mouth.

“Fuck. Tight,” Chanyeol licked at the corner of his mouth, trailing down his neck when Baekhyun turned his head away with a whine, unable to rock back with his legs spread so far apart to accompany Chanyeol between his knees, “Thought you fingered yourself earlier, honeybee. Impossible.” 

“J-Just… big!” Baekhyun squealed, throwing a hand over his red face.

Chanyeol tsked, kissing his ear, “Adding another finger, we have to do three - at least. Okay? Hang in there, I know, it’s good.” 

Baekhyun would normally pout at him for sounding so cocky, but during sex Chanyeol had all rights to be cocky. He had all rights to brag because Baekhyun could have cum by now if the man _wanted_ him to.

“Ah. Want to see your face, you know I want to,” He cooed, moving Baekhyun’s fingers from his face to reveal his red face, glossy eyes, chewed mouth and breathless expression. “There’s my love.” 

“Ah- Ch-Chanyeol! Ch- please hurry!” 

His nails dug into Chanyeol's arm and he honestly couldn’t even tell if the man had two fingers or three because Chanyeol could get him off with just one, so two or three was an _easy_ way to make him lose his mind.

“Sh. Sh, I’ll ease up.” Chanyeol cooed, kissing along his cheek, “Touch me. Focus on me, you know I won’t have sex unless you’re stretched.” 

Baekhyun pouted his mouth but earned kisses for the expression anyways.

It was a good idea though, because Chanyeol was _gorgeous_ , and fully deserved his attention all the time.

He was an easy distraction. 

“Ug- fuck, baby.” 

Baekhyun’s hand was shoved into his boxers, fingers tracing over his length and lower abdomen.

Chanyeol breathed very deeply when he was turned on, growl like noises in his breath as he cursed and dug his face into Baekhyun’s jaw, whispering praise into his ear.

He always praised Baekhyun from day one of touching him, that he was so good despite the younger not having a clue what to do.

And Chanyeol _really_ never complained or even gave suggestions, only gently correcting and cooing, grunting into his skin and combing his hair out of his eyes.

_Ah, easy on the teeth, baby - nevermind, fuck that’s hot._

_That’s good, so good, you look so goddamn good._

_You can squeeze more, tighter, you’re not going to hurt me._

“Look at me,” Chanyeol moved his forehead to rest on Baekhyun scraping his teeth over the youngers swollen bottom lip, “Love you. Shit, I love you.” 

No matter how many times Baekhyun had heard it he couldn’t get tired of it.

Not since Chanyeol had first blurted it out.

They had been in the cafe, directly across from where Baekhyun used to sit all the time at the library.

Chanyeol had been so scared when Baekhyun asked him to take him into where he “stalked him.” 

It turned out to be a very amazing day though, because the corner of the cafe was quiet, but had a lot of talking in the background.

It was warm and comfortable and their food was delicious.

And so was the company that had a confession bubbling to the surface.

_“Probably a year after watching you. I just.. just knew then, when.. one day you were laughing. You laughed and I thought it was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen. I thought..._

_Wow, I have to have him, I have to hold him. I have to.. make sure he smiles like that.. for me. I just.. I love him.”_

Chanyeol _had_ teared up when Baekhyun said he was sure he’d been in love with him the moment he kissed him all on his own in the hot tub. Chanyeol adamantly denied crying, claiming it was more of an eyelash in his eye, but Baekhyun called him out so they settled on, _you teared up, Chan._

“Love you,” Baekhyun whimpered, blindly kissing Chanyeol's mouth. “Please, now.” 

Chanyeol agreed silently with a long kiss on his lips, sitting back and prying Baekhyun’s fingers off his boxers with a playful glare to which the younger giggled about, bringing his hand to his lips to lick the precum off his fingers just to see Chanyeol groan.

“You’re the devil.” He accused playfully, wiping his hand on the blanket and removing his boxers.

Baekhyun giggled, rolling onto his front to sit up on his knees and elbows.

“Hey-“ A playful pinch came to his ass and he squealed, dropping down onto the bed in a fit of laughter, “-want to see your face! Don’t be ridiculous, gonna kiss you until you pass out.” 

He was still laughing even as Chanyeol flipped him onto his side with a hand in his hip, and laughing more when the man tossed the lube bottle at him with a playfully irritated look. 

Baekhyun did as was silently requested with red faced laughter, the corner of his eyes crinkling as he kissed Chanyeol's hip and added lube to his length, cheek pressing against his abdomen as he giggled more and kissed along his stomach.

“Okay, giggles, let me -“

“No!” Baekhyun whined, leaning over to smack the foil from Chanyeol's hand.

“Baby, it’s going to be-“

“ _N_ _o._ Want you only.” 

Chanyeol looked like he wanted to argue, looked hesitant, but smiled gently, manhandling Baekhyun down onto the bed with arms around his waist to place a pillow under his back, kissing down his throat and grinning more at the laughter he got in response.

“Happy birthday, honeybee.” 

~~~~~~

Baekhyun woke up with a quiet groan.

His eyes narrowed at the lamp on the side table and he smacked his lips, it was three in the morning _._

He sighed, wondering if it was his insomnia that wanted him to stay up, but after a moment of sitting there he quickly realized it was because Chanyeol wasn’t beside him.

Baekhyun stretched the smallest bit and whined under his breath.

He wasn’t really in pain, couldn’t possibly be when Chanyeol had been _overly_ concerned.

But he was a bit sore, lower back slightly upset with him.

That was perfectly fine though and Baekhyun found himself smiling as he wrapped himself in a robe as he stood up.

Because he felt _amazing._ He felt beautiful to have love marks down his neck, to have tiny finger prints on his hips.

He knew Chanyeol would be upset, would apologize for hours once he noticed them, that he’d be devastated to leave little bruises on him.

But that was okay, because it meant his boyfriend had enjoyed himself too, because Baekhyun hadn’t been in pain then and he _wasn’t_ now.

In fact, it’d been beautiful to feel Chanyeol pepper kisses onto his face, to see the look of pleasure on Chanyeol’s face, to see and hear such a strong man rave and moan into his ear, to suck his own marks into Chanyeol's neck.

_“-you goddamn, idiot! I fucking told you that I was busy this entire week! Take care of it! I don’t fucking care, call up-“_

Baekhyun peeked through the door before grinning at Chanyeol seated on the red, circular chair in the corner of the living room, probably trying to be quiet so he wouldn’t wake Baekhyun up.

_“-Don't give a fuck, that’s not an excuse. I won’t come back now! It’s Baekhyun’s fucking birthday- no, it’s a week long, I don’t fucking care if it’s already passed! I promised him a week and he’s getting a fucking week!”_

He shimmied out of the room, cream colored robe slightly dragging on the ground and about halfway there Chanyeol turned around.

He was still in the middle of ranting, vein angrily sticking out on his forehead.

His hair was messed up still, a trail of marks down his chest and boxers sitting low on his hips, but his hand was reaching out for Baekhyun instantly.

_“-you better have a good reason for this absolute bullshit! If it’s not taken care of by the time I fucking get back I’ll shoot you mysel-“_

Baekhyun curled up in his lap like a kitten, cheek moving to rest on his shoulder and pressing his feet up onto Chanyeol's opposite thigh.

The man's arm came around his shoulders to hold him closer, and Baekhyun knew it was coming when Chanyeol pet his hair for one second before splaying his palm across his ear, pulling him closer so the other was pressed against his skin.

It didn’t silence the anger or threats, but it muffled them the slightest bit, and Baekhyun never cared enough or had the heart to tell Chanyeol he could still hear everything he was saying, no matter how horrible.

Because he honestly didn’t mind.

He sighed against Chanyeol’s chest, arm moving to hang loosely around his neck. Baekhyun’s eyes flickered up to meet Chanyeol's and he smiled prettily, a tired look in his eyes as he sent him a cute air kiss.

_“-no, you fucking listen here! You have six days until I get back and-“_

Baekhyun waited for the rant to be done, watched Chanyeol's face mellow out the smallest bit to lean down and kiss his hair.

Chanyeol mouthed an _I love you._

Baekhyun slept peacefully.

Right there on Chanyeol’s lap with a hand over his ear and a few kisses against his head.


	8. Extra: Would you love me more if I killed someone for you? (Part One)

Baekhyun wasn’t in a very good mood lately.

It had nothing to do with anything specifically… but everything to do with a person.

See, Chanyeol had one of his father's closest men visiting.

That was fine and all, it just threw off their routine of daily coddling and he found that Chanyeol had been spending a lot of time with the man and even hadn’t come to bed the last few nights.

He understood that his boyfriend hadn’t seen the man in a long time, but it was still.. worrying.

Well, tell someone with anxiety not to worry and they’ll worry ten times _more,_ so that’s how that was going.

Baekhyun truly was just so bored, he was tired of staying in when Chanyeol usually took him out. He’d texted Kyungsoo to see if the other wanted to come out with him, but hadn’t heard a thing so now he was just planning on going by himself.

It _wasn’t_ like Chanyeol would care, let alone notice, so it was fine, he sent the man a text and had yet to hear anything back from him.

He trailed downstairs, still somewhat hopeful that he’d spot anyone to come with him, but he didn’t and it made him nervous.

It was _fine,_ Baekhyun just walked over and grabbed a coat from the rack anyways, looking through the keys to see which cars were still here and trying to remember which order they were parked in so he didn’t have to do any maneuvering.

“What do you think you’re doing?” 

Baekhyun jumped so hard he hit his elbow on the wall and hissed, face turning pink.

In his momentary pain, he found the keys being grabbed from his hand and frowned, chewing his lip nervously as he looked at Minhyun. 

He was an older man, double his own age and truthfully he had no idea what he and Chanyeol had in common as his boyfriend had _kind_ eyes and never scared Baekhyun intentionally.

But he’d found himself being glared down on by this man before, found narrowed eyes at him.

So to say Baekhyun was _afraid_ of him was an understatement.

“I said what are you doing?”

Baekhyun swallowed hard, “Going o-out..” He whispered, looking at his boots.

He knew he sounded pathetic, but he just got the worst of vibes from Minhyun, and he was scared of what he was doing because he’d never really had to speak to him before other than a few hello and goodbyes just to make Chanyeol happy.

It was kind of entertaining as Jongin didn’t even seem to want to entertain the man either.

“Yeah?” Minhyun laughed but it was dry as he hung the keys back up, “I _don’t_ think Chanyeol would want his bitch leaving without him. You’re not going anywhere.” 

Baekhyun’s stomach dropped along with his mouth parting in shock. 

It’d been a long time since he’d felt offended and now he was starting to get the same vibes from him as he did his father's _old_ friends. 

_You want to play some games, boy? Sit on uncle's lap and we can play._

_Baekhyun, you better fucking listen._

_Look at all these candies, pretty boy, you see all of them? You want some of it?_

Recently, Baekhyun had blabbered a lot to Yixing. And the more he spoke the more he remembered and _no_ he hadn’t played with or had any of the cocaine nor marijuana they offered him as a kid.

He was both happy and sad the more things he had blocked out, because he _hadn’t_ been touched technically, but it nearly felt like it with all the things he’d overheard and ignored because he hadn’t understood. 

“H-He doesn’t ow-n me..” 

“Oh, baby boy, doesn’t he though?” Hands were being wrapped around his wrists and Baekhyun straightened his spine up alerted as Minhyun stepped close and pressed into his space, “He said so last night when some bitch at the club was on his dick, hm? You must _not_ be that great of a whore to keep around.” 

Baekhyun’s breath picked up and he wasn’t sure if he was going to pass out or just drop into the fetal position to cry, because he didn’t know what to believe - what to think.

It was _possible,_ it’d been a while since they’d been intimate, and it’d been days since Chanyeol had slept in the same bed as him.

Nearing a week since Minhyun had been here.

It didn’t _matter_ if Chanyeol had woken him up accidentally this morning with a kiss, it was still _possible_ that even after a year he was seen as a whore.

As an object.

Because technically he _was._

Breath fanned his face and Baekhyun freaked out, releasing a screech of panic and shoving Minhyun so hard the man tripped over the bench beside the door and to the ground.

He didn’t stop to check though - if he was going to have a panic attack it would be in the comfort of his own room. 

Not his and Chanyeol’s, but his empty room.

******

Baekhyun had decided after a long two hours of sobbing in the shower that he would just move back into his own room for a few nights, he had found that his wrists were a bright red and since he’d been so afraid of the man's _words,_ he hadn’t realized his grip was bruisingly tight. 

Still, he found the man's words harsher than even his grip despite the way one of his wrists had a light bruising around it.

He’d just stay here, he told himself, he’d just hangout in his old room and stay until Minhyun left and _then_ confront Chanyeol.

Nearing nine o clock, there was a knock on the door and Baekhyun stayed quiet because if it was Chanyeol he _didn’t_ want to see the man yet.

He wanted to figure out his options before then.

He loved Chanyeol - and he knew Chanyeol loved him, and it was still unfair of him to keep assuming the worst of the man.

But he _was_ a criminal, and assuming the worst of a criminal did not sound too far out of the box.

Cheating wasn’t a crime, but it sure felt like it should be.

“Baek?” 

Baekhyun looked up from the book in his lap and was glad it was just Jongin bringing in a plate of food, a wide smile coming on the others face.

“Hey, Kyungsoo made you a plate, said you didn’t come down for dinner and weren’t texting back.” 

Baekhyun for a second found himself near tears again purely because Jongin and Kyungsoo were so _perfect_ together, and he couldn’t wait for their wedding.

Even if it made him jealous.

“I-I uh.. not hungr-“

“Did you end up going out earlier?” Jongin asked, pushing a few books off the bed so he could take a seat and basically forcing the plate into Baekhyun’s lap by setting it on the book in his hands. “What’d you get?” 

“.. didn’t go,” He mumbled, brushing the hair behind his ear and licking his lips because the truth was he was absolutely ravenous right now.

A large hand came out to grab his arm and Baekhyun was instantly wide eyed and nervous, “Are these bruises? Baek, are these? Does Chanyeol know? Wher-“

“You should g-go.” Baekhyun stammered quickly mainly because he was tearing up again and this time didn’t have the cover of the shower to hide his tears, “I’m.. tired.” 

Jongin clenched his jaw and raised both brows at him and Baekhyun just _knew_ that look and also knew he wasn’t going to be getting away with shitty excuses.

Instead he burst like a water fountain and buried his eyes into his elbow.

Last he had a good cry was probably a happy cry when Chanyeol had brought him his driver’s license - honestly he didn’t know if it was even a real one or not, but it _looked_ real.

Baekhyun was just so nervous he’d fucked up the driving test twice and the third time Chanyeol was the one that spoke to the instructor after so he wasn’t completely sure if his boyfriend had convinced her or if he simply failed and Chanyeol just made him pass anyway.

Chanyeol was just _sweet_ like that and the thought made him sob harder.

“Damn it, Baekhyun. You know we hate it when you cry.” The younger murmured before Baekhyun was being pulled into a hug, “If you keep crying, then you are uninvited to the wedding - I won’t have any tears.” 

Baekhyun laughed but it sounded more of a wail as he dug his cheek onto Jongin's shoulder.

“If you start having an attack, I'll have to go get someone, Baek. You know I-I can’t handle it, it scares me and you _know_ I won’t admit that cheesy shit to anyone else, babe.” 

Jongin was sensitive, but it was kind of hard to be when you were supposed to be this scary pedaler.

Baekhyun knew best because Chanyeol had this sort of idea that he had to be strong and yell, that he had to order and point guns in order for people to do what he liked, to _seem_ like he had zero weaknesses.

(That was pretty hard when Baekhyun curled up on his lap.) 

“I.. you can’t tell Chanyeol,” He whispered, not detaching from Jongin's neck.

“Baek…” The other warned. 

“P-Please,” He squeaked, sniffling and wiping his eyes over Jongin's shoulder, “Nini please.” 

Jongin was _weak_ for the nickname, and Baekhyun thanked Kyungsoo for telling him it just about a million times because it _always_ worked on the younger.

“Damn it. Fine, I promise.” 

It still took Baekhyun a few minutes to be able to form words, it took him a bit to be able to keep his breathing calm enough to think.

But listening to someone else’s breathing helped a lot.

So Jongin didn’t try to push him even if they waited in silence for a good ten minutes, just patting his back and Baekhyun knew the other got scared of panic and anxiety attacks because they did look _scary._

But he knew it was because Jongin had to deal with Chanyeol's when he was really young, even if the other didn’t directly tell him as much. 

Chanyeol _did_ though, and that in itself said enough.

“I-was.. g-going to the market,” He muffled into Jongin's shirt, “Getting keys.. he just.. just attacked me.. I thought.. thought he was going to _hurt_ me, he.. called m-me a whore, b-bitch.. said.. said-“ Baekhyun dry sobbed quietly, “C-Chan cheat-“

“No.” Jongin grabbed his upper arms softly and pulled him back to look at him, “No. You don’t believe that for a second, Baekhyun. Chanyeol loves you. Look, I’m going to go pull the footage as _proof,_ okay? We’re going to figure this out, Baek. Don’t draw conclusions so fast, Minhyun is a fucking _rat.”_

Baekhyun frowned with tears dripping down his neck as he nodded, “I.. I didn’t- he just was so mean.” 

“Fucking hate the guy,” Jongin hissed, wiping Baekhyun’s cheeks free of tears even if they had new ones seconds later, “We won’t let him touch you, Baekhyun. He’s a fucking creep, and even father didn’t like him - Chanyeol is being _cordial_ because we... we have some business shit going on; it’s a business transaction.” 

It certainly didn’t _feel_ like Chanyeol was just being cordial.

******

Baekhyun didn’t have time to wait for Jongin to figure shit out for him, because only two days later he was being woken up rather loudly to the door opening and cursing.

He rolled over to the sound of something being knocked over and rubbed his eyes before noticing Chanyeol wobbling and holding onto the dresser and trying to remove his shoes.

_Drunk._

Chanyeol drank often, but he didn’t really get _drunk._

In fact, Baekhyun couldn’t really recall the last time he did.

“You- in the wrong room.” 

Baekhyun sighed and watched his boyfriend hit his knee on the dresser and curse, “You finally noticed?”

“Huh?” The elder mumbled, face flushed as he stumbled to the end of the bed and laid down only on the end.

Baekhyun tried not to be annoyed and sat up to get on his knees and lean over the man to unzip his coat, but Chanyeol laughed and was quick to grab his cheeks to pull him down for a kiss and the younger pushed him off instantly, sitting back and pulling the blankets up to his chin. 

“Baby? Bab-“

“You haven’t seen me in _two_ days, what were you doing?” 

Chanyeol groaned as he rolled over onto his stomach, stretching and laying down like he was about to go back to sleep and now Baekhyun was pissed off, “Chanyeol. Where were you?”

“Downstairs,” The other mumbled, eyes closed.

They didn’t really fight, so Baekhyun didn’t know _what_ to do or say. He didn’t know what to bring up because Chanyeol was a very lazy drunk and he didn’t even know if the man would remember in the morning.

But he was _hurt._

“Were you with someone else?” 

The elder opened his eyes tiredly and even though the room was only dimly lit by the reflection of the bathroom light Baekhyun had left on because he _hated_ to be alone in the dark - he could see the bloodshot look of Chanyeol's eyes. 

“No. Why- why would you think that?” Chanyeol asked, more or a slur than anything as he tried to grab Baekhyun’s hand, “Minhy-“

Baekhyun had tears running down his face as he jumped out of bed, walking over to his closet, “Your friend is an _asshole.”_

“Baekhyun, I know that- that..”

“You can’t even _talk_ right now, don’t follow me.” The younger ordered, wiping his nose on the robe over his shoulders, “Really. Don’t find me.” 

Chanyeol, of course, wasn’t going to have that and was stumbling to lay a hand on the door, wobbling on his feet as he used his other hand to pet his hair, “What's _wrong?”_

Even if he _wasn’t_ drunk Baekhyun didn’t want to have this conversation with Chanyeol. It was too sensitive, his boyfriend was very sensitive about it and he was _too,_ he was afraid too, and right now Baekhyun felt he had the _right_ to be more scared than Chanyeol.

“I _know_ you cheated on me,” He cried, pushing the hand from his face, “And your.. your-“

“I didn’t- what? What? I can’t-“ Chanyeol tried to think, scratching his own temple. 

“Your friend tried to come onto me!” Baekhyun burst, pushing Chanyeol to the side, “I haven’t seen you in a _week!_ Move, Chanyeol!”

He honestly had no idea if Chanyeol was just processing or shocked at him yelling - because Baekhyun _didn’t_ yell, he was the one that shook and hid when others were yelling if it wasn’t someone he trusted.

Or if Chanyeol was just a drunken idiot - but Baekhyun was able to push Chanyeol to the side.

He’d be sleeping with _Jongdae_ for the night.


	9. Extra: Would you love me more if I killed someone for you? (Part Two)

The next morning Baekhyun felt a little better, if only a tiny bit.

Because even though Yixing and Minseok had come bursting Jongdae's door down and refusing to let him sulk as Jongdae had said he would, he felt a small bit better at the yellowish bruise he could see on Minhyuns elbow at breakfast.

It was fading, old, and the timespan fit with when he pushed the other down.

Jongin seemed to know what it was from too because the other had winked and pulled out a seat between him and Kyungsoo instantly.

Either that or he just knew Baekhyun didn’t want to be here at all - much less when Chanyeol came stumbling down.

The man had searched the table and took a step towards him like he was going to give him a kiss - because that was a _Chanyeol_ thing to do - but thought better of it and took a seat beside his asshole friend instead.

Only Baekhyun saw him looking at Minhyun closely, but also at Baekhyun too.

And he couldn’t tell which one of them Chanyeol was looking at with mistrust.

“Eat more,” Kyungsoo touched his hair and brought his attention over to the other, “Swear, Baek, if you don’t eat more then we’ll be missing you at the wedding.” 

Baekhyun ducked his head and smiled through his hair, “You guys keep using that as a threat,” He whispered softly, drowned out by the sounds of forks hitting glass.

Kyungsoo laughed and scratched his hair, “Because we know it will _work,_ sweet pea.” 

It _does_ work, but Baekhyun wouldn’t admit that.

Even if he knew the two would never not invite him to their wedding, Baekhyun usually pretended to buy the threats just because he knew they cared enough to threaten it.

“Hey, what’s that on your arm?” 

For a second Baekhyun wasn’t even sure who Chanyeol was talking to and was pulling his sleeves over his wrists before hiding his arms under the table.

When he looked through his hair he _knew_ Chanyeol had seen that, because the other sat back with a raised brow before turning to Minhyun beside him with his jaw clenched, “Didn’t notice that last night? You got in a fight?” 

Baekhyun swallowed thickly and felt Kyungsoo reach over to find his fingers under the table and it was appreciated because he was sure he was going to have an anxiety attack if not able to feel the others pulse on his wrist. 

“Just some _bitch,”_ Minhyun spat without even looking his way, “Anyways. Let’s check out your sales, Yeol.” 

_Yeol._ Baekhyun felt disgusted as he’d only ever heard their friends - family - call Chanyeol as such.

“Yeah, just give me a minute, I need to talk to Jongin. I’ll be back.” 

Baekhyun sent Jongin a panicked look when the other started standing up, empty hand reaching over to latch onto the others pocket in a silent plea. 

Smiling, Jongin seemed unfazed and leaned down to peck his cheek, _“I’ll take care of it.”_

Baekhyun heard Chanyeol clear his throat, and knew the other got unneededly jealous of his nearly _married_ brother, but Baekhyun couldn’t even find it in him to feel bad when Jongin was comforting him better than his own _boyfriend._

In fact, he looked at Chanyeol passively when Jongin walked around his chair to kiss Kyungsoo goodbye. 

His boyfriend looked very regretful, but Chanyeol wasn’t the type to just deal with all his baggage in front of everyone - hence that time he’d let Baekhyun leave the room in panic when he first arrived but now the younger knew the other was extremely sorry for being worked up. 

“Baek, you want to go to the garden?” He heard Sehun ask across the table and internally thanked how oblivious the other was.

He looked away from Chanyeol instantly and nodded frantically. 

******

If Chanyeol and Jongin had spoken Baekhyun hadn’t heard anything about it.

The only thing he _did_ hear was something about Chanyeol being mad when he walked the halls a few hours earlier.

Whatever. He could _be_ mad and watch Baekhyun _not_ care.

Baekhyun was just busy sprawled across the lounge in the library as he knew nobody else would be coming in here - well, maybe Jongin, sometimes Kyungsoo, but everyone else was not really _allowed_ in.

Even though Chanyeol adamantly denied ever saying such a thing.

He probably didn’t, but everyone knew how much he missed his dad, so they didn’t intrude on his things.

Baekhyun rolled over onto his hip, resting his unoccupied hand under his cheek, “Fairies have to be one thing or the other, because being so small they unfortunately have room for one feeling only at a time..” He whispered, pulling his knees up into a ball.

He felt calmer when reading, and he had practically every book imaginable to go through in here, and Jongin had even said he could have access to the attic if he wanted and that there were _more_ books there.

Books could help a person escape. Help you feel things that aren’t _real,_ to dream things otherwise unimaginable.

Baekhyun loved books.

“Well, well..” 

His hair stood up as he looked in the doorway, “You.. you’re not allowed here,” He said instantly, moving to sit up right, “Only I am.. allowed…” 

Minhyun looked rather unamused at that, rolling his eyes and rapping fingers along the doorframe, “What'd you do, bitch?”

Baekhyun tucked his book into the cushion and dug his hands between his knees, “I.. don’t k-kno..”

“Don’t fucking lie!” The man snarled, before stepping into the room and pointing an accusing finger, “You dumb whore! What’d you do? I had a _job_ you know! Fucking bitch! You goddamn whore! What’d you do? You fuck him to make him believe you?“

Baekhyun had been shaking since the first yell, pulling his knees up and balling up.

Trying to _breathe_ through the feeling.

But he was going to die, he was going to suffocate in such a position because he hated yelling - he hadn’t been yelled at in so long, he hated it - it was loud and booming, absolutely frightening.

Was he going to get hit? Would he be hit and yelled at? 

For what! What’d he do? What’d he do? Why was he in trouble? 

“- nothing but a no good dumb slut! You think you can just come here and seduce them! Huh? You think you’re something? You’re _nothing!_ I had a fucking _job_ to do and you had to go meddling! Look at me! Look at me! Fight me like a man!”

Baekhyun _wasn’t_ a fighter though, he wasn’t anything at all other than a boy that had issues and liked a handful of people and to cuddle in his boyfriends lap for attention.

A hand yanked his wrist and he went smacking onto the ground, kicking at Minhyuns legs in panic as he scrambled backwards, covering his face with his arms and preparing to pass out either being hit or on his own tears and closing throat.

_“What are you doing? What the-“_

Baekhyun released a throaty and scratchy scream, turning to latch his nail onto the lounge so he didn’t scratch his face up. 

_“You.. what are you doing to him? What the fuck- you’re dead! What’d you do to my baby? Huh? What’d you do!”_

He wasn’t a fighter at all, but that didn’t mean Chanyeol wasn’t. 

Baekhyun had just never _seen_ his boyfriend in a fight, but he was practically forced to now as he felt arms wrap around him and the only other time Sehun had been around when he had a panic attack was when the other had nearly suffocated him a year ago.

But he’d _learned_ better and now his hands were merely patting along his back and gently moving him so he wasn’t nearly suffocating himself against the cushions, “We’re counting, Baek. We’re counting, hey, we’re going to count to ten now.” 

It was hard to pay attention given the angle he’d been turned to when it was facing Chanyeol who had yanked Minhyun straight out of the doorway and was pummeling him.

_“You think I didn’t know your fucking plan! As if I’d ever give you access to my warehouses! You jus- you majorly fucked when going after what’s mine! Dumb fuck! You think I’d let you touch him? Huh? You think it’s fun to just assault defenseless people?”_

If anything, Baekhyun felt _better_ watching and listening to Chanyeol. That or it was a combination of the protection and Sehun whispering into his shoulder, moving his weak arms down and away from his neck when Baekhyun went tiredly limp.

Exhausted on fear and he really just wanted to sleep now, even if he was still scared.

 _“I kill you! You’re dead! I don’t fucking care who sent you, but you made a fucking mistake! Son of a-“_ Chanyeol was kicking at the beaten man by the time Baekhyun saw Jongin running down the hall to shove him away.

He wasn’t _stupid,_ of course he knew there would be violence involved with his boyfriend. Chanyeol had once pointed a gun at _him_ before on accident.

Baekhyun knew the price of entry, he knew that he wasn’t fit to be here let alone witness such aggression and blood.

But once in the entire year he’d been here was much less than he was expecting.

And he didn’t feel afraid of _them._

Only the man that was bloodied and coughing on his side, stuttering words Baekhyun could see not hear, but it was probably not something he cared to hear anyways as Chanyeol yelled another, _“You fool! We have fucking cameras, you think I fell for you trying to get me out of the house? We caught you snooping you goddamn rat! Baekhyun was just some extra fun, huh? Trying to touch MY boy?”_

He should have known. Chanyeol was no _idiot,_ and Minhyuns appearance had been literally out of the blue.

Literally, he’d just appeared when the others were at the warehouses, said that he had gone to the corner they were known to disperse on and hassled Jongdae to contact Chanyeol.

Sketchy, but Baekhyun didn’t and _purposely_ didn’t get involved with those things. He didn’t mind them, but someone with so many issues _really_ didn’t need to be wandering warehouses full of the substances he’d always wanted to run from.

It was okay, because Chanyeol didn’t go much either, usually only out to threaten or probably _kill_ someone to protect their business.

Baekhyun didn't care so long as he didn’t have to know, and they were really good about never doing it at the house.

“That's enough, Chanyeol.”

“Dude, I think he’s dead. That’s enough.” 

“Yeol! That’s enough!” Jongin ordered, pushing him harder, “Go take care of Baekhyun, fuck. I know you’re mad, me too, but this is going to take _forever_ to clean!”

Jongin sounded like more of a whining child than someone that just witnessed a murder, but Baekhyun didn’t even get to see what he was referring to as Sehun had a palm over his peripheral vision and it covered his eyes when he turned his head to look.

It was best he didn’t anyways.

_“Let me- fuck, hold on, let me jus.. don’t let him look yet.”_

Baekhyun wasn’t really _trying_ anymore. He was all worn out and just resting on Sehun's shoulder, knees pulled up into his stomach and he knew he was making the position really uncomfortable for Sehun, but he was really tired and didn’t even know how long he’d been sitting here.

It could have been forever and he knew no differently. 

He heard the water running from the bathroom just across from the office and muffled talking, but by the time Baekhyun was nearly asleep there were arms wrapping around his waist and keeping him turned away from the door.

Baekhyun threw a tired arm out towards Chanyeol instantly when he realized who it was.

“Close that door please,” The elder murmured in his hair over his shoulder, petting the back of his head as he carried Baekhyun over to lay in his lap as he took a seat on the lounge.

There was still muffled talking even as the door clicked shut but it hardly mattered as Baekhyun curled his legs up into Chanyeol's chest with a hand stroking over his cheek.

“Been a while we had to do this, hm? It’s still okay and not a hassle, baby boy.” Chanyeol said, pressing a kiss to his hair.

Baekhyun smiled a small bit because it had been a while he'd needed help and been so scared, tilting his head down to look at his own nails but Chanyeol quickly was grabbing his chin with a soft noise, “Don’t look down, just look at my face only, honeybee. Okay? Just here.” 

That was easy to do even if Baekhyun was aware of the blood he could see on Chanyeol's collar but didn’t mention he saw it if his boyfriend obviously didn’t want him to see. 

“You know I was just going along with it, right? Jongin said he talked to you. Of course I believed you, baby.” 

Baekhyun’s entire body sagged in relief and he found enough energy to press a kiss to Chanyeol's jaw, snuggling his face into the elders neck. 

“Sweetheart, I love you. Of course I believed you. We were just going along because he had our address when he arrived - a slip up obviously. There’s no way he could have had it, so he’d been watching us.”

“Will.. you be looking for who.. sent him?” Baekhyun whispered tiredly.

Chanyeol hummed, kissing along his cheek, “Definitely. Until they’re found I won’t be leaving your side, baby. And nobody comes in we don’t know - nobody leaves alone. I’m sure our answers are probably in the fuckers phone. But I’d never just let danger hang around you.” 

Ironic when Chanyeol was _dangerous._

But, you’d ignore it if you loved someone dangerous too.

“By the way,” The elder soothed, resting his lips on Baekhyun’s forehead, “Never would cheat on you, angel. Watched the footage and I think you handled it well, I should teach you to punch a few times too,” He chuckled and brought the youngers knuckles to his lips, “Never did, my love. We didn’t even go to clubs. We were just going out to scout my dealers so I could _pretend_ to think there was a betrayal. He kept going on and on about our _security._ That it was lacking, it was so suspicious. I think he was paranoid and that’s why he didn’t want you to go either, trying to make sure we were all where he could watch us. I’ll _always_ believe you first, Baekhyun. Always. Love you much more than anything else.”

“You..” Baekhyun sighed guiltily, “..were drunk.” 

“That was drinking with Minseok, honeybee,” Chanyeol mumbled softly, “You know how he is - challenging. i went to get you before, but you were asleep, I didn’t mean to wake you up either. You just look so pretty sleeping.” 

He wasn’t really in the mood for his boyfriend to be so sweet to him when Baekhyun had been quick to jump to conclusions and lose faith in him. 

Now he just felt so bad.

“Love you..” He whispered quietly, pressing his nose into Chanyeol's cheek with a deep sigh. “Just love you.” 

“Sh, it’s okay,” The elder soothed, holding Baekhyun’s knees against his chest and rubbing up and down his legs, “You were in the dark, it’s fine. It’s completely fine, I’m just upset I didn’t come find you fast enough. Should have known my pretty baby was reading, what were you reading, honeybee? Hm? What’s on the list for today?” 

He hardly needed to respond because he felt Chanyeol reaching around and jostling him a small bit and knew the other was grabbing the book anyways, “Peter Pan.” 

“You know that’s my favorite. You want me to read to you?” Chanyeol cooed, kissing his hair and resting his arm over Baekhyun’s hip holding the book.

“Yes please.“


	10. Extra: Take my heart now, go ahead and break my heart down

“You want to dance?” 

“Can’t dance, Chan..” Baekhyun mumbled shyly, moving to brush his hair back when it bumped the clip in his hair and he remembered that Jongdae would probably be pissed should he ruin his hair the other spent forever doing for him.

Kyungsoo and Jongin's wedding was _beautiful._

It was all pretty flowers and the colors red, black, and white, they had an entire museum rented out for the night.

It was a historical building from the eighteenth century housing the same era furniture and a ballroom to fit all of their guests.

Baekhyun found it a fitting arrangement for the two of them.

“Can teach you, my love,” Chanyeol whispered, petting over the side of his neck, “My pretty boy, there’s been so many whispers of you tonight,” He added softly, pressing a kiss to Baekhyun’s jaw, “Have to keep you close to me.” 

It made Baekhyun suck his lip into his mouth and give an eye smile along with a blush, fingers finding Chanyeol's pant pocket to hold onto.

He found himself admiring his boyfriend more than usual tonight, and he wasn’t the _only one._

Chanyeol just looked so good in a suit, a proper suit with his hair gelled back from his face and a genuine smile on his face at all times.

Because his baby brother was _married,_ and even Chanyeol couldn't pretend to not be extremely proud.

They all had matching ones outfits - him, Jongdae, Minseok, Sehun, but Chanyeol's was only a little different because it had a pin of red flowers in the breast pocket of the black suit.

Baekhyun thought it was really fitting and even when his boyfriend removed his jacket, Chanyeol hadn’t broken conversation with people the younger had _no_ idea of, petting his spine when Baekhyun moved the pin onto the white button down instead because he felt Chanyeol deserved to wear something special at all times.

He had gotten all sorts of red flower clips in his hair and only left them because Kyungsoo said he looked really pretty and that he was really glad Baekhyun matched his red suit rather than the black or white flowers the others had to match Jongin.

He’d been nervous, but it was _his_ wedding so Baekhyun didn’t remove them because Kyungsoo liked it. 

And Baekhyun loved him and nearly made him cry when he’d told him such backstage before the ceremony.

Baekhyun just loved everyone a whole lot.

“There.. Chanyeol..” 

“Yes, honeybee.” The other said instantly, attentive because of Baekhyun’s nervous fingers rubbing his pants back and forth anxiously.

Baekhyun looked up at him with puppy-like eyes, “There’s.. a lot of people out there, Chan.” 

He didn’t need to say another word as his boyfriend stood up, abandoning his jacket onto the back of his chair and putting a hand out for him.

It didn’t matter where they were, if Baekhyun needed air he needed air and that was that.

“It’s stuffy in here, isn’t it?” Chanyeol cooed, wiggling his fingers in offering.

Baekhyun giggled and grabbed his fingers to be pulled up and out of his seat.

He knew Chanyeol couldn’t care less of crowds of people, but Baekhyun _did_ , he wasn’t used to it and would rather be alone than with tons of people.

He was led over to the newly weds table and Baekhyun found it adorable that Jongin was a bit red faced with Kyungsoo leaning on his shoulder, probably both tired out as it had been a good few hours since they’d cut the cake and danced.

“I’m taking Baek out for a bit,” Chanyeol said over his shoulder, patting the very bottom of his spine, “Air.” He explained.

Instantly, the two were nodding, because the _really_ didn’t need an explanation, but Baekhyun was very happy for them, excited, and it didn't matter how many times today he’d congratulated and came to the two of them for attention, he was wandering around the table to hug Kyungsoo's neck.

“You guys be safe on your honeymoon?” He requested, squeezing the man.

Kyungsoo laughed and kissed his cheek, “Of course, sweet pea, you give us a call if you miss us.” 

Baekhyun _was_ going to miss them, but before he could say as much Jongin was tugging on his sleeve and he was sure the other was slightly tipsy because he always had a goofy smile when he drank. “Baek! We’re going to see you really soon!” 

Baekhyun bounced on his toes and was overwhelmed with fondness as he pressed a quick kiss to Jongin's cheek and hugged his hand to his chest, “I love you guys.” 

“We love you too, sweetheart,” Jongin replied softly, pinching his cheek, “Don’t you be missing us while we’re away, okay? It’s only two weeks.” 

That was a long time when you were used to seeing people daily, but Baekhyun just nodded and squeezed his fingers.

“Ah, don’t you make my baby cry,” Chanyeol warned playfully, tapping his hand on the table.

Jongin snickered and Baekhyun felt Kyungsoo touch his hip likely just because they all knew Chanyeol was testy about people touching Baekhyun.

Not today though.

Truthfully, he was positive Jongin and Kyungsoo could get away with kissing him on the mouth today and Chanyeol wouldn’t say a thing, despite Jongdae once trying to dare Kyungsoo to and Chanyeol just about flipped the dining table over in his disagreement because Jongin just thought it was funny.

“I _guess_ you can have him back,” Kyungsoo chirped playfully, gently patting Baekhyun’s side.

Baekhyun _always_ found it easy to make himself at home on Chanyeol's side and snuggled under his arm easily and earned a rewarding kiss on his temple.

Chanyeol led him outside, it was dark out now and they only had string lights to light the path over a small bridge where Baekhyun had sat when they were setting up just to feed the fish in the pond until Minseok came over to playfully scold him for hiding.

“Baby,” 

Baekhyun hummed and removed his jacket to set on a bench, running his fingers over petals because they were _so_ pretty here.

Maybe he’d start gardening because he didn’t realize how much he liked flowers until now.

“You want to dance now?” Chanyeol asked against his hair, pressing into his back and smoothing palms down his hips. 

Baekhyun didn’t care much for dancing, but he loved closeness.

And even more, it was obvious Chanyeol very much _did_ want to dance with him, because this was the second time he’d asked, and he never really repeated himself unless he really wanted something.

“Okay.” Baekhyun mumbled, turning around to rest his palms on Chanyeol's shoulders, “Don’t know how..” 

Chanyeol just kept smiling, eyes bright and fond as he arranged Baekhyun’s hips closer to his and rested his arms on the curve of his spine, hugging him close.

It really was just a hug, only swaying slightly.

It was nice and Baekhyun rested his head down on Chanyeol's chest, fingertips touching a bit of the soft hair at the nape of his boyfriend's neck.

Times like these felt better when it was just them and Chanyeol was resting his chin on his head and simply relaxed.

“I think I picture you as more a.. outdoor wedding kind of person.. lots of flowers and vines wrapping on everything, what colors? You love blue..”

“You like gold.” Baekhyun whispered back, a small smile playing on his lips.

He felt Chanyeol nuzzle into his hair, his hand soothing down his spine and they didn’t _need_ to discuss it directly.

Not really. 

They just _knew,_ and that was the best feeling.


	11. Extra: Love is such a fragile dance, this love is such a fragile dance

Chanyeol woke Baekhyun up by lifting him into his arms, he grabbed a small blanket to wrap around him, protecting him from the cold air. 

Baekhyun shifted in his sleep, grumbling under his breath, as his - Chanyeol's - shirt shifted off his shoulder to reveal his collarbones, “W-What are you doing?” He whispered, eyes still closed and voice laced with sleep.

Chanyeol chuckled and placed a large hand on his head to keep his neck from hurting later. He walked out of the room with Baekhyun in his arms, shushing him, “Go back to sleep baby, it's 2 am.”

The smaller stared at him, and then whined placing his head on his shoulder as Chanyeol carried him down the stairs. “Why so early?” 

“We have a long flight ahead of us, so I wanted to go now to be there at a decent time.” 

Baekhyun wanted to whine more, because he hadn’t even known their trip was so _soon,_ of course Chanyeol never told him a time, he just planned things as he went.

Still, it was a fun trip, or so he hoped. “We’re going on a trip!” He exclaimed groggily using a hand to touch his cheek.

Chanyeol walked down the last stair as he placed a kiss on Baekhyun's temple, heart warmed at his excitement. “That's right, tiny!”

Chanyeol set Baekhyun down for only a moment to wrap a blanket around his shoulders before groaning playfully as he lifted him back up, “Are you awake enough to walk?” 

Giggling, Baekhyun shook his head, “Course not. Never.” 

The elder snickered at that, having to adjust him multiple times in his arms in order to simply open the front door with keys dangling on his fingertips.

“Clingy tonight, honeybee?”

“It’s two in the morning, should be sleepin’.” Baekhyun grumbled softly, tangling fingers into the hair at the nape of the others neck and inhaling the forest scented cologne on Chanyeol.

He wondered if the other even _slept_ or if his excitement had been too much for him. 

It was so unusual for Chanyeol to be so excited for much of anything, but he’d been ever since he’d begun to plan this trip months ago. 

“Gotta stand on your own for a second, gorgeous.” 

Baekhyun whined as he was set to his feet, curling his sock covered toes up with a visual pout, one that Chanyeol took obvious joy in as he was quick to cup the back of his head and press heated kisses onto his lips while unlocking the car beside them. 

The smaller just sighed and parted his lips tiredly, clutching his boyfriends sleeve with a now wet pout and groggy eyes.

“Tired baby boy,” Chanyeol cooed, making him blush and laugh sheepishly as a large hand combed down his cheek to his collarbone to pull the blanket around him tighter. “Get that pretty ass in the car.” 

Baekhyun laughed but silently demanded a few more kisses before jumping in. 

~~~~~~

“Woah!” Baekhyun exclaimed as Chanyeol carried him into the jet, he didn’t remember how he was moved from the car, because he admittedly passed out on the whole car ride. 

The elder chuckled in his ear as he wiggled out of his arms.

“Like it, Baek?” He asked, watching as Baekhyun trailed a finger over the cream colored couches. 

“Chan! It's so pretty!” Baekhyun gasped, taking in the gold embellishments and the expensive dark bocote wood. 

Baekhyun peeked into the mini fridge, giggling when he saw his favorite drinks inside. He could feel Chanyeol watch as he explored the cabinets and compartments, eyes taking in the youngers excitement in his sky blue pajamas. 

As he walked by the couch, looking out the windows Chanyeol reached a long arm out and pulled him towards him, snatching Baekhyun against his chest. 

“Aw! Chan, i wasn't done!” Baekhyun whined.

Chanyeol hummed and kissed his jaw multiple times causing Baekhyun to giggle. “Get some more rest, it’s a sixteen hour flight.” 

Instantly Baekhyun whined and twisted to settle with his spine to Chanyeol's chest, resting his head back onto the others shoulder, “So long.” 

_“You’re just full of complaints for someone about to be spoiled rotten!”_

Smiling, Baekhyun felt a few kisses placed onto his pulse as he twisted in order to look down and manually start digging in Chanyeol's pockets. 

The elder laughed but otherwise just made an amused face at his antics.

“Games?” Baekhyun pouted up at him, shyly curling his fingers around Chanyeol's phone inside the elders pocket seeing as all his stuff was likely all packed up and put away. 

He felt long, slender fingers work under his top near his hip only to run gently over his skin, “Of course, my love.” 

With a blushing beam Baekhyun twisted to sit sideways, lifting his hips up a bit in order to allow Chanyeol to get comfortable before settling into his lap once more. 

“Hey.” 

Baekhyun hummed distractedly as he fiddled with the phone brightness as it was much too late for his eyes to be dealing with that.

He felt his top be pulled to the side and squirmed a bit as a kiss was placed onto his bare shoulder, goosebumps coming onto his skin.

“I love you. You know that?”

The younger was instantly filled with adoration and giggled bashfully as he laid Chanyeol's phone down onto the couch to turn and hug around his neck, burying into his cheek. “I love _you.”_

~~~~~~

When Baekhyun woke up he was on a brown leather couch and blinked up at a ceiling.

Not the ceiling of the jet, but a wood ceiling.

He jerked to sit up and was wowed at the huge living room, fixtures of marble and walls an elegant red.

He heard shuffling and suddenly didn’t feel all that tired as his boyfriend strolled in, obviously having no idea he was awake as he was holding a glass of what Baekhyun could only assume was expensive alcohol and whispering under his breath.

Baekhyun couldn't hear exactly what, but Chanyeol looked _nervous_ and if he knew anything about the elder it was that he never got nervous unless the reasoning was _extreme._

Perhaps mainly nervous whenever Baekhyun was having a nervous breakdown, but he always handled it well.

Either way, Baekhyun released a soft laugh and reached over to grasp Chanyeol's sweatpants at his waistband.

Not a smart idea to catch a man like Chanyeol off guard because his first instinct was to raise a fist, but Baekhyun wasn’t afraid at all anymore and instead laughed at his reaction, brushing a hand over his naked waist before laying back down. “Gotcha.” 

“You little shit.” 

Baekhyun squeaked as the larger tossed his glass down onto a side table and promptly grabbed his leg with a chuckle, “Someone woke up in a good mood.” 

“Kiss, please.” 

Chanyeol never to this day denied giving any affection to him and grinned ear to ear as he settled himself over top of Baekhyun, holding himself up in his elbows to peck his lips a million times.

They stayed like that a while longer, Chanyeol resting his cheek onto Baekhyun’s sternum and although the elder was larger than him, the added pressure felt nice. As if protection.

Baekhyun never felt unprotected with Chanyeol at all, but it was warming to just comb fingers through his hair in a way the elder did to him often, to hold his head down onto his chest and let him _relax._

It reminded him that he was the only one ever to see Chanyeol like this - that he was the only one being loved by him like this.

It felt amazing.

“It’s snowing outside.” 

The smaller gasped, dropping his gaze down to the crown of Chanyeol's head, “No way. But it wasn’t cold-“

“You were brought in sleeping like a _baby.”_ Chanyeol teased, shifting to sit up and Baekhyun couldn’t help watching the muscles of his upper body flex as he pushed himself to sit back, _“My baby._ Don’t worry, I packed you only warm things.” 

Excitement filled the smaller, he couldn’t even recall last time they’d gone to the snow, likely the last time was last winter or the one before - all Baekhyun recalled was laughing for hours when Chanyeol slipped on ice. 

Of course only until the elder got fed up and dragged him down to kiss him in the snow until they were both shivering and in need of hot chocolate. 

“Chan!” 

Chanyeol just grinned at his excitement, eyes fond and soft as he dragged Baekhyun fingers to his lips to press pecks onto the tips of them, “God, I love you so fucking much.” 

It felt different than normal. Not the normal, nonchalant coo, and it didn’t help that Chanyeol had already said so today - or yesterday - Baekhyun had slept a long time.

So, the younger just blushed, crawling into his lap to press a soft kiss to Chanyeol's brow and smile into his cheek. 

“Pretty baby.” He heard praised, muffled into his neck and _normally_ Baekhyun would find the wet kisses to his throat seductive, and was wondering if the other was going to make a move or tease him.

Only Chanyeol kept his hands waist high and was simply petting his sides in a relaxing motion, no groping or teasing to be found. 

“You love m-me a lot today,” Baekhyun whispered, a bit flustered at the atmosphere change because truthfully he’d been expecting the man to have him in a bed by now, have him sprawled out in soft sheets.

They loved living with the others, truly, but things were always more intense when they knew it was just the two of them, regardless of having their own room.

Here, they could wake up and spend solo breakfasts together. Baekhyun could walk around only in Chanyeol's shirt and not be teased endlessly for it. They could be as lovey as they wanted and nobody would be here to know other than them.

That seemed a funny thought given Baekhyun wasn’t shy interrupting Chanyeol for attention nor was the elder bashful at _all_ about throwing all the praise in the world out for him.

“What are you talking about?” Chanyeol laughed, tilting his head up to kiss Baekhyun’s chin, “I am loving you just as much as I do _all_ the time. Just the right amount. I.. guess maybe I’m being more obvious today, only because I feel sentimental; it’s not everyday we get to be together alone.” 

Baekhyun could disagree because at least once a day Chanyeol would chase everyone off, and they spent every night together, every morning together in bed, but he understood what Chanyeol was getting at.

“I.. can we go play in the snow?” 

The elder smiled with a laugh, pressing his grin into Baekhyun’s cheek, “Go put something warm on, i'll start warming up something warm to take out with us. I want you to look like an absolute marshmallow or your ass isn’t going anywhere,” Chanyeol teased, patting his hip.

Baekhyun threw his head back in a laugh, wanting to argue the other wasn’t even wearing a shirt nor anything, but settled for pressing a chaste kiss to Chanyeol's naked collarbone and popping off his lap.

“I’m making your favorite for dinner too, so we’ll have to run to the store so don’t look _too_ pretty! I don’t want any people staring at you!” 

With flushed cheeks, Baekhyun squeaked and started shuffling blindly down a hallway and blushing more at his boyfriends laughter.

He had no idea what had gotten into the elder today, nervous and now domestic, then back to playful.

Chanyeol normally had _two_ attitudes and they came in the form of coddling Baekhyun to death, or smirking up a dangerous storm.

Either way, Baekhyun was enjoying his happy mood and beamed as he made it to the end of the hall to their room.

Their _gorgeous_ room.

The bed had a blue drapery over the dark brown wood of the frame, the walls an icy blue color with black, marble-like flooring.

It was absolutely amazing, and Baekhyun found it almost _too_ beautiful which led him to laugh at the thought because he was spoiled rotten and barely deserved such things.

He still accepted and appreciated them either way though.

Dragging himself to a suitcase lying by the bed he could only assume it was his - but once popping it open he found it adorable that both his and Chanyeol's clothes were shoved inside with rather obvious excitement.

Really, for someone so well kept the suitcase was extremely disorganized.

Chanyeol was _cute_ even if he would nip at his cheeks for saying something like that.

At least Baekhyun didn’t need to look for long because he was just stealing whatever was off the top regardless who’s it was because Chanyeol would just remove them from him later _anyway._

His cockiness was shown in the pairs of panties thrown in, rather lacy ones that made Baekhyun want to hide them even though he should be used to such things by now.

But he _wasn’t_ because everytime he tried to calm down he would remember the dark look in his boyfriends eyes when he wore such things for him.

Anyone would think Baekhyun was a virgin with how much he was blushing by himself, stripping his pajamas off only to snatch a wool sweater and thick leggings before adding jeans over top. 

He knew Chanyeol hadn’t been kidding about him being a walking marshmallow and made sure to add a beanie and second sweater on.

The one missing piece was a coat, and Baekhyun didn’t see any inside the suitcase and huffed, struggling to stand up with all his warm items on as he shuffled towards the side of the bed.

All he saw was the jacket Chanyeol had been wearing on the jet and he snatched it up quickly.

But a noise distracted in, the noise of tumbling, of something heavy falling onto the marble.

Baekhyun frowned at his own accident proneness and bent down to pick up the small box.

It looked like a watch box, only smaller and led the smaller to believe it had to be a new watch the other had gotten and forgot to tell him.

Only when he popped it open he found how wrong that idea was.

The sparkling gold very much was no _watch_ and very much was not anything less than breathtaking. Literally, Baekhyun couldn't breathe.

Funny how a ring could reduce someone into a pile of excited tears.


	12. Extra: You’re the only thing that keeps me from diving off the deep end

There was a gun sitting on his dresser.

A fully loaded _gun_ just sitting there.

Baekhyun couldn't stop staring at it, what was he supposed to do?

What was a person _supposed_ to do when there was a fully loaded gun _on their dresser:_

Well, pick it up first of all, but Baekhyun had never found the courage to do that before and it showed.

It must have shown because a figure walked by and with long slender hands picked up the black object and fiddled with it for only a second before suddenly it was being placed back down where it had been before only with the ammo beside it instead of inside of it.

How fucking _weird._

What was even weirder was how _not_ scared or anxious he was looking at it and knowing it was there.

Even _less_ paranoid and anxious when large, strong and calloused hands were cupping both of his cheeks and warm lips were placed onto the center of his forehead leaving Baekhyun to release an unintended sigh of relief and grasp Chanyeol's wrists.

“Whatcha looking at, cuddle bug?” The elder rumbled deeply into his skin.

Baekhyun’s sight was of a golden and tattooed chest, eyes lingering around the thin trail of hair on Chanyeol's navel and fingers itching to touch hard abs. 

“Nothing,” Baekhyun muttered, curling fingers into the waistband of Chanyeol's pajamas and lifting his head to accept a deep and loving kiss to his mouth.

It turned deeper until he was being pushed back into their red silk sheets and laughing into the elders mouth, hands being grasped above his head in larger and warmer palms. 

_“Chan!”_ He cried with a red faced giggle as the elder took place between his knees, blushing at the compromising position regardless they were dressed so minimally _because_ of recent actions.

Baekhyun just knew he was flushed all the way down to his underwear. 

Chanyeol pulled back after getting a squeal into his mouth from his knee pressing into a love bite on Baekhyun’s inner thigh, a huge grin on slick lips as he held smaller hands on his. “What a liar. Can tell when you’re lying because your voice goes higher than normal.” He teased.

Baekhyun couldn't deny it because it was probably true, so he giggled instead, tasting a cinnamon flavor on his tongue from whatever the elder had drunk before coming back to their room.

It used to make him _so_ embarrassed when Chanyeol wandered the halls after they made love, when he didn’t care about his state and went out in only sweatpants with scratches down his spine and kisses on his skin. 

Because Chanyeol didn’t _care_ and even _wanted_ to flaunt their love. 

Baekhyun couldn't deny that it warmed his chest to come downstairs after a heated night and be welcomed even if only in pajamas and a silk robe to Chanyeol's lap even though the man sometimes had company.

It made him _feel_ special. Feel powerful.

Chanyeol always kissed at lovemarks he left the night before, humming in acknowledgement as strange people Baekhyun didn’t know explained _stocks_ and _new drugs._

So Baekhyun didn’t find it too embarrassing now a days, in fact he barely even blushed when he and his fiancé decided to come down to the kitchen after making love and another person came in. 

He always just accepted whatever affection Chanyeol wanted to give, even if he was on a counter and being kissed rather heatedly while hearing others walk by. 

They were _engaged_ after all, and while they were teased for being so touchy these days Baekhyun had been told many, many times of everyone’s approval of him. 

Really anytime Chanyeol left the room Baekhyun was smothered with teary eyes and thankful explanations and cooes about how happy everyone was for Chanyeol _and_ him.

Although he understood their worries, it must have been scary for them to think Chanyeol never stood a chance with him - for him to be so enamored with Baekhyun who barely knew him that he protected him for _two years._

 _Stalking,_ some would say, but Baekhyun knew Chanyeol wasn’t the obsessive type. He was possessive and _aggressively affectionate_ but not obsessive.

He wasn’t stalking, but protecting, and Baekhyun believed every word of it because Chanyeol had no reason to watch him in public and make sure he got home safely. He had given _no_ reason for Chanyeol to have fallen in love with him, really none.

Chanyeol claimed it was because of his sweet _voice_ and the little tweak of his nose and lips while playing on those library computers.

Baekhyun just said he was cheesy as all hell and always hid after his cheesy expressions of love.

“I’ll work on it.” 

Chanyeol’s smile was really gorgeous too, even if the man claimed Baekhyun was much more endearing. “We’ll see about that, if I can’t read you then I’ll just go insane, honeybee.” 

Baekhyun laughed this time, curling fingers around Chanyeol's palms and the action must have reminded Chanyeol he was holding him down because the elders eyes flickered to their hands before he was sitting back and allowing Baekhyun to scoot back into the headboard.

Although he wouldn’t release his hand because Chanyeol followed along with him, holding the palm and gently running fingertips over Baekhyun’s knuckles.

For someone so _not_ soft, Chanyeol was always awfully gentle with him, long and powerful fingers merely petting his fingers.

It should scare him knowing these exact hands had done terrifying things, but it didn’t.

“Chanyeol?”

The elders' eyes flickered to him with a hum, forehead pulling together with something akin to concern.

Baekhyun wished he wouldn’t make so many frowns or scowl so much because it reminded him of how quickly Chanyeol had looked aged from the first time he’d ever seen him to the next time he was in that alleyway where he’d scared him almost to death.

“Just wanted to let you know I’m excited.” 

He wouldn’t care at all if the lines on his face were from smiling, because Chanyeol's face lit up when he smiled.

“Me too, baby.” He beamed, bringing Baekhyun’s fingers to his lips to kiss along his knuckles.

Baekhyun eye smiled back, pink lips pressed together and quirked up as if he couldn’t help keeping some sort of grin on his face as he watched Chanyeol carefully twist the ring off his finger.

It had a special stand on the side table, that way they couldn’t forget to place their engagement bands on every morning, and soon they would hold _wedding_ bands.

Baekhyun was really happy regardless that the same hands that had just taken apart a gun were now laying rings down as if they were the most precious things ever.

Chanyeol spent more time simply setting both of their bands down on their tree shaped stand than he had taking apart a weapon. 

“I’m not that nervous,” Baekhyun commented, shifting onto his knees in order to shuffle closer to Chanyeol's side, throwing arms around his shoulders and laying his cheek in the crook of his neck, nails gently scraping over matted curls. 

“Yeah? That’s great, pumpkin. There’s no reason to be nervous.” Chanyeol’s arm came around his naked waist, palm covering the expanse of his hip as he turned to kiss below his jaw. “Not with me. Right, beautiful?” 

“Correct,” Baekhyun chirped, snuggling into the elders arm and pressing a soft peck to the spot. “Don’t think it’s possible to ever be scared of you. You’re not scary to me at least.” 

He should be, but wasn’t and Chanyeol beamed very handsomely at his words, grasping his chin and Baekhyun thought he was about to be kissed breathless again and parted lips ready for it.

Only Chanyeol just smiled against his mouth and rested their faces together, “The day I ever scare you I’ll wish to be killed.” 

Baekhyun gasped and pinched his shoulder at the words, pouting lips, “Now I’m scared, don’t talk about dying like that. I’ll lose my mind.” 

“Me dying scares you?” 

“You even being sad scares me. You can’t love me if you’re not here and I can’t love _anything_ if you’re not here.” 

Chanyeol didn’t have time to reply before the younger was attaching their lips rather urgently.


	13. Extra: And it hurts to know just how lovely you are

Chanyeol never took Baekhyun with him into areas he considered dangerous,  _ ever. _

His fiancé was very explicit about Baekhyun not being around anything gang related or even in the vicinity when things occurred, but they couldn’t really anticipate everything.

They’d been out in the city just an hour before to try different cake flavors and look at flowers for the wedding, but Chanyeol was a busy man.

And he  _ rarely  _ went to the warehouses, so when Chanyeol had to be called in due to demanding workers, they knew it was a big deal. 

Now Baekhyun was worried - not that he would get hurt - but he was just uncomfortable given he wasn't ever around much of this stuff. 

He had his eyes locked on a gun sitting in the net holder on the back of the passenger seat; Chanyeol would never leave him defenseless even if he was just stepping out of the car, and Baekhyun appreciated it but they both knew he would never be able to shoot a gun.

Hence why both Kyungsoo and Jongin were in the front seat, the sound of Jongin's thumb tapping against the steering wheel seemed like a small attempt at comforting Baekhyun but nothing could really distract him from the sound of Chanyeol’s anger.

It sounded heartless of Baekhyun to say he didn’t care what Chanyeol was doing to the workers, he was threatening them, offering them a bullet instead of higher pay, but Baekhyun understood all of these workers were criminals that had been recruited for one task and one only - distribution. 

He couldn’t really have pity for people that were killers, abusers, and possibly..  _ rapists.  _

The only thing that had Baekhyun so worried was the thought of Chanyeol spending longer than needed inside a warehouse full of drugs.

He was clean. He’d been clean a long time, but just knowing Chanyeol didn’t like to come to the warehouse due to his  _ own  _ worries of relapse made Baekhyun find the situation worrying.

Baekhyun tried to picture it sometimes. He’d asked Sehun and other members for details about that time period.

And it all seemed so entirely  _ upsetting.  _ Because Chanyeol was so young and from what Baekhyun heard it sounded like he didn’t know what to do about the sexual assault and never even hinted about it to others.

Baekhyun was the only person that knew, and it was his responsibility to keep it that way, because he’d spoken to Chanyeol a few times about it and the only thing Chanyeol expressed was  _ embarrassment.  _

He was embarrassed over what happened, he was ashamed, he thought Jongin would hate him if he found out, or that the gang would find him weak.

Baekhyun dismissed all that because it was such  _ bullshit,  _ they all loved him, but from the eyes of Chanyeol that’s what things seemed like and it would be revolting of Baekhyun to argue with Chanyeol when he was the one in that situation.

So when he pictured Chanyeol young, high, and passing out during breakfast only to be yelled at by his father for his addiction, Baekhyun just felt protective. He wondered if Chanyeol’s father would have been more understanding if he knew what happened.

He wondered if Chanyeol wouldn’t have taken his fathers sometimes  _ awful  _ words to heart if they’d just discussed it.

From what Baekhyun knew Chanyeol loved his father, so when he was addicted and called a  _ disappointment,  _ a  _ slob,  _ a  _ disgrace,  _ well… Chanyeol tried so hard to make up for his mistakes in life, and Baekhyun wished Mr. Park was still around so they could patch those wounds up.

“Baekhyun-“ Jongin was cut off by the sound of banging, something being hit and Baekhyun’s first instinct was to peer outside of the tinted windows.

The warehouses were on a dock, Chanyeol had a few of them, and they were pulled up so the headlights of the car lit up a red, metal warehouse that was full of crates.

From what Baekhyun understood the workers wanted to be paid more for their labor, which included loading boats and distributing the drugs. 

Chanyeol had been livid when he heard, and Baekhyun tried not to stick his nose into things that made him scared, so the moment Chanyeol told Jongin to take him here he knew it was serious.

“There he goes again with the temper.” Kyungsoo mused, snickering from the passenger seat.

Baekhyun peered out the windshield to see Chanyeol standing in someone’s face, the man was pressed up against the wall of the warehouse and his feet weren’t even touching the ground.

There was something sickeningly  _ interesting  _ to Baekhyun about the situation, he wasn’t scared to see Chanyeol like this, it actually made him.. feel protected, because there was no world where Chanyeol would put hands on him.

“Well, they are paid a shit ton as is, I mean when you have six counts of sexual assault, you can’t really beg and choose what kind of pay you’re getting.” Jongin commented with a bored tone. 

Baekhyun swallowed and leaned between the two seats, “That guy? What, is he the one that started it?” 

“From what Minseok said, yeah,” Kyungsoo said shortly, turning to look at Baekhyun with a small smile, pressing a tap to Baekhyun’s nose, “But don’t worry, sweet pea, they come close to the car and they’ll be on their ass in seconds.” 

“Preferably not breathing,” Jongin added.

“Yah! Don't tell Baek that!” 

Baekhyun did a slight shrug, chewing on his lip, “It’s okay.. I mean, it’s just weird for me to be here. It feels weird. Like, we’ve driven past before, but it’s not exactly good for… my anxiety to come here. But I’m not oblivious. Chan does tell me things, Soo.” 

Kyungsoo cooed at him, “You're the baby, Yeol shelters you-“

“Chanyeol told me how to shove a knife straight through someone’s neck,” Baekhyun cut him off, “Said it had to be… fast. He said if you leave the knife in then there’s less blood to clean up.” 

Jongin whistled a noise and turned to look at him with surprise that matched Kyungsoo's, “And here I thought you were baby faced  _ and  _ innocent.” 

Baekhyun released a light laugh, ducking his head to cover his reddening cheeks, “I mean.. I tell him I don’t want to know, but you know Chanyeol.. he gets so worried..” 

_ “Just about you.”  _

Baekhyun grinned and sat back in his seat with a small grin, licking his lips and looking at his hands to twist the engagement ring around his finger.

He couldn’t even find an excuse to deny that, because it was so true.

“Well, he worries about you guys too-“

The car door opening cut him off and Baekhyun gasped at the cool breeze that filled the car, quickly scooting over to make room for an angry, red faced Chanyeol.

“Tomorrow,” Chanyeol began the second he was in the car, leaning over the backseat and Baekhyun saw Jongin scramble to leave as fast as possible, “I want you, Sehun, and Jongdae to come here and shoot whoever doesn’t help pack that fucking ship. Would’ve fucking done it myself but they’re lucky Baek is here. Stupid fuckers.” 

Baekhyun wouldn’t admit it, but he appreciated Chanyeol not doing anything bloody tonight - although his fists were a bit cut which suggested he’d gotten some hits in, but Baekhyun had zoned out the second Chanyeol got out of the car.

It was supposed to be a good night, they’d playfully argued a bit over decorations and cake and then the next second Chanyeol was ready to kill. 

Sometimes Baekhyun felt like he was going to get whiplash from the attitude changes Chanyeol went through.

And right now he could tell Chanyeol was  _ pissed,  _ so mad it seemed like nothing would be able to calm him down. 

His jaw was tensed, actions jerky, his gun was sticking out of his pocket for easy access instead of where it had been hidden in his waistband. 

Baekhyun fiddled with his own fingers for a second in thought, he wasn’t sure exactly what he could say in this situation considering crime related things weren’t his expertise.

But Chanyeol  _ was  _ his expertise - or at least his fiancé said Baekhyun knew the most about him than anyone else.

_ “Chan…”  _ Baekhyun whispered beneath his breath, reaching over the seat to set a hand on Chanyeol’s knee.

He gained Chanyeol's attention in an instant, his fiancé’s forehead was crowned with angry veins, and his eyes were slightly narrowed, but that seemed to settle when Baekhyun smiled at him. 

“Hey.” 

And then Chanyeol chuckled. A single, calm sounding noise that made Baekhyun relieved that he wouldn’t be upset all night. 

“Hi, honeybee. Come here.” 

Baekhyun beamed brightly, cuddling under Chanyeol's arm the moment Chanyeol offered him the area, resting his cheek against his ribs and pressing his knees against the elders.

He felt more than heard the heavy breath Chanyeol took into his hair before Baekhyun felt a kiss pressed to his head. 

Baekhyun reached out for his hand, bringing it closer to his face to inspect it for injury before pressing a kiss to his knuckles and placing Chanyeol’s hand into his own lap to hold in both of his own.

“Baby boy.” 

_ “Hm?”  _

Chanyeol ducked his head to catch Baekhyun’s eyes, using the hand that rested around his shoulders to push back Baekhyun's bangs before he smirked, “I still think the marble cake was the best.” 

With a scrunched nose Baekhyun gave a single giggle before tilting his chin up to connect their lips, feeling a large palm coming up to cup his face.

He could feel the cold metal of Chanyeol’s ring against his cheek as they indulged in a few adoring kisses before Baekhyun finally began to giggle again.

Chanyeol always found him cute when he smiled or laughed into kisses, so he kissed him in playful, short bursts so Baekhyun would continue smiling. 

**Author's Note:**

> Twitter: Gigi_B56 - Come see sneak peeks of stories!
> 
> https://curiouscat.qa/Gigi_B56 - Ask me questions!


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